I think some of the items like the pocket pistol and jingle booties are banned specifically because they ARE underpowered and nobody would use them anyways. We don't need to do that here, if somebody wants to wear the booties, or have the high five taunt, let em.
I dunno, Honestly, so much of it is personal preference. I'd like to "ban" as few weapons as possible, but the ones I do want to ban, I hate with a passion. (Lucksman, Gunslinger in arena.
What we could do is have a suggested ban list, then if both matched teams agree to "unban" a weapon for the match, let them.
I'd like to have "representatives" or "captains" for the teams and see them speak to the other reps and organizers as middlemen for the entire team. They can sort out what map (if not the custom map chosen by the organizers) and game mode both teams would like to play. That way if team A and B are in a match and they want to play on Fastlane with huntsman allowed, they can do it.
EDIT: Speaking of custom map, we should pick a balanced map made in the last month or so. . . (maybe 5 CP?) as the "default" map and install it. I haven't played TF2 since like september, but I could take a look.