Obviously, "Jewell" typed on this thing every day for years—so when she retired, her co-workers painted it gold, and had the commemorative plaque made, as a gag retirement gift. It was a safe bet that the dang
keeb was not something she'd want to keep seeing for the rest of her life. LOL.
Also, can someone gild me a beamspring when I retire?
Therefore, to be possess'd with double pomp,
To guard a title that was rich before,
To gild refined gold, to paint the lily,
To throw a perfume on the violet,
To smooth the ice, or add another hue
Unto the rainbow, or with taper-light
To seek the beauteous eye of heaven to garnish,
Is wasteful and ridiculous excess.– Wm. Shakespeare, "The Life and Death of King John"