Viva's Dating Advice Thread

[tp4tissue]

I've always theorized that women were of equal perversion, and our only difference lies in the degree of linguistic subtlety.

-Beehatch-'s choice of words:

___The live octopi can make people squirm *wink

-Halverson-'s choice of words:

___Live. So they can squiggle into all the holes


Thoughts?

hahahahahah

Well to be fair, I think it was more of a progression in my reply. Start subtle, then go more obvious. The next step should have you being VERY specific.

either way.. you've both ruined my lunch..

You eating octopus? hahaha I got some squid in my freezer, I should defrost them and have some fun ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

No I'm having squid as well..

made them skewer style in the toaster oven.

[Halverson]

Op, si yo quiero una novia, cual idioma debo de usar? Mi Ingles o mi Espa�ol?

neither, use the language of love

Correct. Learn French.

So admit defeat? Got it

Just need to learn one sentence:

"Je pense que tu es tres belle."

Works like a charm.

Your panties are terrible? Okay, I'll give it a try

HEY HALVERSON JE PENSE QUE TU TRES BELLE

La grenouille mange du pamplemousse

[Halverson]

I've always theorized that women were of equal perversion, and our only difference lies in the degree of linguistic subtlety.

-Beehatch-'s choice of words:

___The live octopi can make people squirm *wink

-Halverson-'s choice of words:

___Live. So they can squiggle into all the holes


Thoughts?

hahahahahah

Well to be fair, I think it was more of a progression in my reply. Start subtle, then go more obvious. The next step should have you being VERY specific.

either way.. you've both ruined my lunch..

You eating octopus? hahaha I got some squid in my freezer, I should defrost them and have some fun ( ͡� ͜ʖ ͡�)

No I'm having squid as well..

made them skewer style in the toaster oven.

I'm saving mine for when I run out of perishable food, like all these damn vegetables....think I'll do them spicy salty style.

[tp4tissue]

I feel left out of this party. What do I bring?

DAT ASS

This just became a Tijuana donkey show

I'm not up for that.. saw it once.. i think it was a small horse actually..

But not interested in seeing again.

[demik]

Op, si yo quiero una novia, cual idioma debo de usar? Mi Ingles o mi Espa�ol?

neither, use the language of love

Correct. Learn French.

So admit defeat? Got it

Just need to learn one sentence:

"Je pense que tu es tres belle."

Works like a charm.

Your panties are terrible? Okay, I'll give it a try

HEY HALVERSON JE PENSE QUE TU TRES BELLE

La grenouille mange du pamplemousse

Wtf u say about my mom

[Halverson]

Op, si yo quiero una novia, cual idioma debo de usar? Mi Ingles o mi Espa�ol?

neither, use the language of love

Correct. Learn French.

So admit defeat? Got it

Just need to learn one sentence:

"Je pense que tu es tres belle."

Works like a charm.

Your panties are terrible? Okay, I'll give it a try

HEY HALVERSON JE PENSE QUE TU TRES BELLE

La grenouille mange du pamplemousse

Wtf u say about my mom

I said I heard she makes some bomb ass hot sauce

votre mčre fait bombe cul sauce piquante

[demik]

Op, si yo quiero una novia, cual idioma debo de usar? Mi Ingles o mi Espa�ol?

neither, use the language of love

Correct. Learn French.

So admit defeat? Got it

Just need to learn one sentence:

"Je pense que tu es tres belle."

Works like a charm.

Your panties are terrible? Okay, I'll give it a try

HEY HALVERSON JE PENSE QUE TU TRES BELLE

La grenouille mange du pamplemousse

Wtf u say about my mom

I said I heard she makes some bomb ass hot sauce

votre m�re fait bombe cul sauce piquante

I'll give you some bomb ass-sauce ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

[Halverson]

Op, si yo quiero una novia, cual idioma debo de usar? Mi Ingles o mi Espa�ol?

neither, use the language of love

Correct. Learn French.

So admit defeat? Got it

Just need to learn one sentence:

"Je pense que tu es tres belle."

Works like a charm.

Your panties are terrible? Okay, I'll give it a try

HEY HALVERSON JE PENSE QUE TU TRES BELLE

La grenouille mange du pamplemousse

Wtf u say about my mom

I said I heard she makes some bomb ass hot sauce

votre m�re fait bombe cul sauce piquante

I'll give you some bomb ass-sauce ( ͡� ͜ʖ ͡�)

grodies

[HoffmanMyster]

how long is it acceptable to hate someone that has flipped their spacebar?

Perma-ban

beehatch!  tsk tsk tsk.  You will never learn.

* HoffmanMyster bans beehatch

**** gon get messy! We should have the wedding at the rape cabin!

Damn it don't tell them the name or else they won't come. It has to be a surprise!

I still came after hearing the name.  There are still a lot of surprises to be had. 

[beehatch]

how long is it acceptable to hate someone that has flipped their spacebar?

Perma-ban

beehatch!  tsk tsk tsk.  You will never learn.

* HoffmanMyster bans beehatch

First you give me a hug, then you wanna ban me ;_;

Why are you giving me mixed signals?!

[HoffmanMyster]

how long is it acceptable to hate someone that has flipped their spacebar?

Perma-ban

beehatch!  tsk tsk tsk.  You will never learn.

* HoffmanMyster bans beehatch

First you give me a hug, then you wanna ban me ;_;

Why are you giving me mixed signals?!

I dunno!  Why do you think I'm in the dating advice thread??   

[demik]

Sasquatch has bad people skills

[Seranite]

Sasquatch has bad people skills

You don't KNOW his struggles!

[beehatch]

how long is it acceptable to hate someone that has flipped their spacebar?

Perma-ban

beehatch!  tsk tsk tsk.  You will never learn.

* HoffmanMyster bans beehatch

First you give me a hug, then you wanna ban me ;_;

Why are you giving me mixed signals?!

I dunno!  Why do you think I'm in the dating advice thread??   

I'm just assuming you're here because you don't know how to lure women when you don't have your beard.

[HoffmanMyster]

how long is it acceptable to hate someone that has flipped their spacebar?

Perma-ban

beehatch!  tsk tsk tsk.  You will never learn.

* HoffmanMyster bans beehatch

First you give me a hug, then you wanna ban me ;_;

Why are you giving me mixed signals?!

I dunno!  Why do you think I'm in the dating advice thread??   

I'm just assuming you're here because you don't know how to lure women when you don't have your beard.

It's called woooooing, not luuuuring...   

[beehatch]

how long is it acceptable to hate someone that has flipped their spacebar?

Perma-ban

beehatch!  tsk tsk tsk.  You will never learn.

* HoffmanMyster bans beehatch

First you give me a hug, then you wanna ban me ;_;

Why are you giving me mixed signals?!

I dunno!  Why do you think I'm in the dating advice thread??   

I'm just assuming you're here because you don't know how to lure women when you don't have your beard.

It's called woooooing, not luuuuring...   

I feel like buttering up sounds even better than woOoOOoOOoing.

Plus, if you're into a food fetish it works out great.

[HoffmanMyster]

Why are you giving me mixed signals?!

I dunno!  Why do you think I'm in the dating advice thread??   

I'm just assuming you're here because you don't know how to lure women when you don't have your beard.

It's called woooooing, not luuuuring...   

I feel like buttering up sounds even better than woOoOOoOOoing.

Plus, if you're into a food fetish it works out great.

I do like butter...and food is the best.  But I don't know if I have a food fetish...?  How would I tell?

[beehatch]

Why are you giving me mixed signals?!

I dunno!  Why do you think I'm in the dating advice thread??   

I'm just assuming you're here because you don't know how to lure women when you don't have your beard.

It's called woooooing, not luuuuring...   

I feel like buttering up sounds even better than woOoOOoOOoing.

Plus, if you're into a food fetish it works out great.

I do like butter...and food is the best.  But I don't know if I have a food fetish...?  How would I tell?

Well if you often find yourself gawking at cantaloupes, watermelons, bananas, and other voluptuous fruits, then I would hazard a guess you have a fetish or two.

Butter just helps as lubrication.

[demik]

Sasquatch has bad people skills

You don't KNOW his struggles!

I can't match his hustle, we can't catch his hustle, we can't fathom his love dude

[vivalarevolución]

Starting this thread was the best idea I've ever had on Geekhack.

By the way, the language of love is French, not French Canadien.








And yes, that was a purposeful misspelling.

[azhdar]

Starting this thread was the best idea I've ever had on Geekhack.

By the way, the language of love is French, not French Canadien.








And yes, that was a purposeful misspelling.

It's not a misspell in the language of love <3

[fohat.digs]

Not to rain on the parade, but all those weird diacritical marks simply need to go away, in the computer/keyboard age, along with anything that chokes a computer, such as the punctuation marks that programming uses.

And conversely, the computer needs to give back the skeleton punctuation set, including period, comma, both apostrophe and quote, parenthesis, and (in my opinion), dash and probably slash.

Yes, it neuters and grays-out many nuances in many (most) Latin/European languages, but they are cumbersome relics from the old world and conflict directly with the digital world.

[tp4tissue]

Not to rain on the parade, but all those weird diacritical marks simply need to go away, in the computer/keyboard age, along with anything that chokes a computer, such as the punctuation marks that programming uses.

And conversely, the computer needs to give back the skeleton punctuation set, including period, comma, both apostrophe and quote, parenthesis, and (in my opinion), dash and probably slash.

Yes, it neuters and grays-out many nuances in many (most) Latin/European languages, but they are cumbersome relics from the old world and conflict directly with the digital world.

If I could install a serial port into my head. I would...   Screw english..

[vivalarevolución]

Not to rain on the parade, but all those weird diacritical marks simply need to go away, in the computer/keyboard age, along with anything that chokes a computer, such as the punctuation marks that programming uses.

And conversely, the computer needs to give back the skeleton punctuation set, including period, comma, both apostrophe and quote, parenthesis, and (in my opinion), dash and probably slash.

Yes, it neuters and grays-out many nuances in many (most) Latin/European languages, but they are cumbersome relics from the old world and conflict directly with the digital world.

You sound so American right now.

[paicrai]

Not to rain on the parade, but all those weird diacritical marks simply need to go away, in the computer/keyboard age, along with anything that chokes a computer, such as the punctuation marks that programming uses.

And conversely, the computer needs to give back the skeleton punctuation set, including period, comma, both apostrophe and quote, parenthesis, and (in my opinion), dash and probably slash.

Yes, it neuters and grays-out many nuances in many (most) Latin/European languages, but they are cumbersome relics from the old world and conflict directly with the digital world.

whats going on here

[vivalarevolución]

Butter just helps as lubrication.

Great advice for this thread. Thanks.

[demik]

Not to rain on the parade, but all those weird diacritical marks simply need to go away, in the computer/keyboard age, along with anything that chokes a computer, such as the punctuation marks that programming uses.

And conversely, the computer needs to give back the skeleton punctuation set, including period, comma, both apostrophe and quote, parenthesis, and (in my opinion), dash and probably slash.

Yes, it neuters and grays-out many nuances in many (most) Latin/European languages, but they are cumbersome relics from the old world and conflict directly with the digital world.

If I could install a serial port into my head. I would...   Screw english..

Show Image

Finally I can agree with tp. Screw the English.

[paicrai]

what keyboard attracts the most men?

depends on what sort of men

the lame ones

razers or HHKB

qft

[beehatch]

guys need advice

should I give a crush a cheddar or muenster grilled cheese?

pls be nice

[azhdar]

give him comte instead of those terrible cheeses.

[baldgye]

guys need advice

should I give a crush a cheddar or muenster grilled cheese?

pls be nice

Depends on her girth.

[beehatch]

give him comte instead of those terrible cheeses.

whats this cum cheese you are talking about?

guys need advice

should I give a crush a cheddar or muenster grilled cheese?

pls be nice

Depends on her girth.

she has less than average girth

[azhdar]

give him comte instead of those terrible cheeses.

whats this cum cheese you are talking about?

This:


top tier french cheese.

[Sygaldry]

give him comte instead of those terrible cheeses.

whats this cum cheese you are talking about?

This:

Show Image

top tier french cheese.

I prefer Camembert.



Introduced to me years ago by a French lover years ago and it's still my favorite cheese to this day

[azhdar]

give him comte instead of those terrible cheeses.

whats this cum cheese you are talking about?

This:

Show Image

top tier french cheese.

I prefer Camembert.

Show Image

Introduced to me years ago by a French lover years ago and it's still my favorite cheese to this day

I love camembert too, but comté and his cousin the beaufort are my favorites.

[beehatch]

give him comte instead of those terrible cheeses.

whats this cum cheese you are talking about?

This:

Show Image

top tier french cheese.

give him comte instead of those terrible cheeses.

whats this cum cheese you are talking about?

This:

Show Image

top tier french cheese.

I prefer Camembert.

Show Image

Introduced to me years ago by a French lover years ago and it's still my favorite cheese to this day

Well I certainly wasn't expecting all these delicious looking cheeses. I doubt I can even find this in my area lol

[vivalarevolución]

guys need advice

should I give a crush a cheddar or muenster grilled cheese?

pls be nice

Cheese is a cultured and appropriate gift for a potential love interest.  I recommend a cheese that will make your kisses taste even sweeter than normal, while also adding slightly funky scent to your breath to keep things interesting.  While French cheeses are well known, and French is the language of love, I recommend a hearty, smooth, and stinky Wisconsin cheese, because 'Murica.

[vivalarevolución]

Not to rain on the parade, but all those weird diacritical marks simply need to go away, in the computer/keyboard age, along with anything that chokes a computer, such as the punctuation marks that programming uses.

And conversely, the computer needs to give back the skeleton punctuation set, including period, comma, both apostrophe and quote, parenthesis, and (in my opinion), dash and probably slash.

Yes, it neuters and grays-out many nuances in many (most) Latin/European languages, but they are cumbersome relics from the old world and conflict directly with the digital world.

whats going on here

American exceptionalism, that's what's going's on.

[HoffmanMyster]

I recommend a hearty, smooth, and stinky Wisconsin cheese, because 'Murica.

Amen.

[Halverson]

I want grilled cheese with red onions.

[baldgye]

guys need advice

should I give a crush a cheddar or muenster grilled cheese?

pls be nice

Depends on her girth.

she has less than average girth

Then go with the dirty French option

[vivalarevolución]

I want grilled cheese with red onions.

For those who wish to know the way into Halverson's heart, here is your answer.

[CPTBadAss]

I want grilled cheese with red onions.

For those who wish to know the way into Halverson's heart, here is your answer.

I just bought him ice cream.


OP I have a question. I prefer my ladies to wear North Face and Ugg boots. Maybe a spray tan. What is the best way to attract such a fine specimen of femininity?

[Halverson]

I want grilled cheese with red onions.

For those who wish to know the way into Halverson's heart, here is your answer.

I just bought him ice cream.


OP I have a question. I prefer my ladies to wear North Face and Ugg boots. Maybe a spray tan. What is the best way to attract such a fine specimen of femininity?

Punpkin spice latte, duh

[HoffmanMyster]

I want grilled cheese with red onions.

For those who wish to know the way into Halverson's heart, here is your answer.

I just bought him ice cream.


OP I have a question. I prefer my ladies to wear North Face and Ugg boots. Maybe a spray tan. What is the best way to attract such a fine specimen of femininity?

Punpkin spice latte, duh

This is a good answer.  #PSL is everything right with the world

[demik]

I want grilled cheese with red onions.

For those who wish to know the way into Halverson's heart, here is your answer.

I just bought him ice cream.


OP I have a question. I prefer my ladies to wear North Face and Ugg boots. Maybe a spray tan. What is the best way to attract such a fine specimen of femininity?

Wow cpt, basic white girls? Really? Cam would be disappointed. You need a hood chick.

[baldgye]

I want grilled cheese with red onions.

For those who wish to know the way into Halverson's heart, here is your answer.

I just bought him ice cream.


OP I have a question. I prefer my ladies to wear North Face and Ugg boots. Maybe a spray tan. What is the best way to attract such a fine specimen of femininity?

Punpkin spice latte, duh

This is a good answer.  #PSL is everything right with the world

Speaking of Coffee, why is a 'large' in Starbucks called 'venti' ? it makes no sense

[Halverson]

I want grilled cheese with red onions.

For those who wish to know the way into Halverson's heart, here is your answer.

I just bought him ice cream.


OP I have a question. I prefer my ladies to wear North Face and Ugg boots. Maybe a spray tan. What is the best way to attract such a fine specimen of femininity?

Punpkin spice latte, duh

This is a good answer.  #PSL is everything right with the world

Speaking of Coffee, why is a 'large' in Starbucks called 'venti' ? it makes no sense

If serious, it's supposed to be 20 ounces and 20 in Italian is venti

[baldgye]

I want grilled cheese with red onions.

For those who wish to know the way into Halverson's heart, here is your answer.

I just bought him ice cream.


OP I have a question. I prefer my ladies to wear North Face and Ugg boots. Maybe a spray tan. What is the best way to attract such a fine specimen of femininity?

Punpkin spice latte, duh

This is a good answer.  #PSL is everything right with the world

Speaking of Coffee, why is a 'large' in Starbucks called 'venti' ? it makes no sense

If serious, it's supposed to be 20 ounces and 20 in Italian is venti

I know Venti is 20 in Italian, hence the confusion lol... but I guess that makes sense, I've no idea what 20 ounces weighs mind, and weight seems an odd measurement for liquids.... Does that mean you get less hot chocolate than a coffee???

[HoffmanMyster]

I know Venti is 20 in Italian, hence the confusion lol... but I guess that makes sense, I've no idea what 20 ounces weighs mind, and weight seems an odd measurement for liquids.... Does that mean you get less hot chocolate than a coffee???

20 fluid ounces.    (591 mL)