today i will finally tell the tale of Rumpelstilzchen. his alias on kbdlab.co.kr is 데스피어, or 'DESPAIR' in English--which is a fitting name for him, as you will come to find. it's only been a few months since i opened my eyes to custom mechanical keyboards, and only this past month that i discovered the beautiful existence of artisan keycaps. due to this, the risks of ordering internationally, and the fact that the dollar is so high against the korean won, i only oggle other people's acquisitions on GH and generally translate GH news to the non-English speaking bulk of my kbdlab peoples. the artisan keycap scene is very, very small in korea.
about four weeks ago, i asked the chat to look at a secondhand custom keyboard that i was considering for my first purchase. the kailh brown switches would require a complete desoldering of switches and full LEDs, which chat unanimously declared would be more trouble than it was worth (at the asking price), especially since i didn't have the tools or the knowledge. i had given up all hope until DESPAIR appears in the chat and offered to sell one of his, a very rare LZ-b10 with vintage stock MX Blacks (clear tops) stickered, lubed, tuned, and lit up like a christmas tree, all at the cost of base materials, only.
of course, i jumped at it. it really is a well-made keyboard, and just as described. little did i know, however, i had paid with my soul, as well...
a week after my purchase, a post went up, announcing 'FREE ASSEMBLY EVENT!' DESPAIR would be welcoming new people by assembling their first keyboard for no cost. he had seen members like me, who wished for one, but didn't know where to start; professional assembly costs were too expensive. why not give back to the community that gave so much to him? the conditions were, you must not own any custom keyboard, and you would have to ship every little part required to him. of course, i would not be applicable, though he did add in the notice that should there be few applicants, those who owned a custom but could not assemble one would also be considered.
two lucky newbies were chosen, and their new custom keyboards were magically delivered to them less than a week later. pictures of happiness and multi-coloured LEDs, followed. with little hope of getting a place in this raffle, i ordered switches. the very next week, DESPAIR made another announcement, calling for another round of participants. this time, he had even talked other reluctant elders into helping. DESPAIR had a custom metal logo sticker made with 'DESPAIR' on it, which he had stuck on the keyboard i purchased, and this sticker would taunt me, forever, as three more members received what they desired, and yet another announcement went up. i ordered acrylic housing, bolts, and bumpers...
by this time, news had spread about DESPAIR. members were increasing, applicants doubling, and i started to wonder when i would offer up my firstborn child to Rumpelstilzchen in return for a slot, while i proceeded to buy some PCBs, a soldering iron & solder. i made a mess of things, the iron too hot. got another. i wasn't alone. the marketplace and Q&A are busier than before.
another announcement calling for new applicants will go up, soon. to this day, i wander the internet in hopes of catching the devious imp as he hops about and sings his song revealing his True Name, which will free my soul from this growing despair obsession.
DESPAIR is not from here*, but he is everywhere.
*if this disqualifies him from being nominated, then that's a bit of justice, i suppose. still, you get to hear a 'good' (!) story from the other side of the world on this, korean thanksgiving (chuseok).