Time to jump in on this thread.
The Girl will be visiting soon, so I'm trying to find the exact right moment to trim my beard. This is essential for a few reasons. The obvious one is that I have super fine hair, so my beard is super soft like a fluffy face bunny. When I trim, I have about a day or two of slightly pokey hairs. So I don't want to trim right before she gets here. Then there is the issue of appearance. I have a curly beard with some blond patches (one on my left cheek, one on my left jawline, and my jazz tuft - right below the lip). This causes issues. Especially if I trim it too short. And I always trim it short. It goes like this.
- Clean shaven - I haven't been that way since high school. My chin is a childhood memory.
- Shorn short - Blond spots make it look patchy. Dude is probably a serial killer. Much sketch.
- Yes - Perfect. Handsome. Women want to be with me, men want to be me. One half cocked smirk is all it takes.
- Long - Scraggly. Face beginning to resemble testicles. Girls that have experienced the softness prefer it though - so I stick with it.
- Super long - it tends to grow out rather than down like those long dwarven beards. Dude is probably a serial killer. If wearing a turtlneck - Dude is probably a whaler.
So there is my venting about facial hair. I require beard therapy. I presume this involves rubbing my beard with oil and a light massage. I will just lay here and accept that, thanks.