4Sevens and Fenix lights are standard fare "tacticool" LED lights. I have a Quark 123T and QMini AA NW I use often, and a LD-15 stashed in the car.
I'd want something solid, waterproof, shatterproof and super small. (small enough to shove up my ass in an emergency)
Is there anything that works on kinetic power
Incredibly difficult set of requirements, especially something also kinetic. The
38DD (a custom light) is viably small and sufficient enough to keep on your person at all times, perhaps helping you access a more capable flashlight if the time comes. Titanium being hypoallergenic could also do well up your posterior, although the initial 38DD design has some sharp edges..
Given that modern LED flashlights often have small and complex circuitry,
my HDS Clicky is apparently
EMP-proof but rarely would anyone ever consider that, much less as a basis for a purchase.