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geekhack Community => Off Topic => Topic started by: tp4tissue on Thu, 21 November 2013, 23:27:49

Title: Keys to getting fat
Post by: tp4tissue on Thu, 21 November 2013, 23:27:49: Irresistible-s in the fridge. List yours!

Turkey hill..

Fish sticks......

Chicken nuggets....

Bratwurst....

Mayonnaise..

Cream Cheese...
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: digi on Thu, 21 November 2013, 23:28:45: beer
beer
and more beer
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: tjcaustin on Thu, 21 November 2013, 23:29:37: Potatoes
cheese
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: bueller on Thu, 21 November 2013, 23:36:44: Quote from: digi on Thu, 21 November 2013, 23:28:45
beer
beer
and more beer

This. Back when I was a drinker I was always overweight, since I quit in March I've lost 25KG (55lbs for you yanks).
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: noisyturtle on Thu, 21 November 2013, 23:40:21: Pizza
Beer
Sticky icky
Rain
Nowhere to go
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: demik on Fri, 22 November 2013, 00:41:18: (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-l3L_Gn16ANQ/UKUM-u2nsTI/AAAAAAAAB94/AnUyhG0oBAY/s1600/IMG_2644.JPG)

this.

**** you costco for introducing this into my life.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: IPT on Fri, 22 November 2013, 00:51:52: BR icecream
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: Michael on Fri, 22 November 2013, 00:54:17: Carl's Jr Double Western Bacon Cheeseburgers x2
Extra Large Fries x2
Extra Large Coke

Eat those once or twice per day for one month and you will reach your goal.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: Jack on Fri, 22 November 2013, 00:56:33: http://reddit.com/r/grilledcheese :-\
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: stancato9 on Fri, 22 November 2013, 00:59:55: McDonalds' Value Menu.

/thread
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: Tym on Fri, 22 November 2013, 01:39:12: Coke, stop drinking water just coke, diet or reg doesn't matter.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: iri on Fri, 22 November 2013, 03:09:50: my dieting tips #432: drink only diet coke when eating those six royal cheeseburgers.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: stancato9 on Fri, 22 November 2013, 03:10:56: Quote from: iri on Fri, 22 November 2013, 03:09:50
my dieting tips #432: drink only diet coke when eating those six royal cheeseburgers.

Lmao so many people do this and it's hilarious. It's okay I can eat these 6 burgers and large fries because I got a diet coke!
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: kolonelkadat on Fri, 22 November 2013, 04:21:29: Crippling depression is great for packing on the pounds. I was 225 with 9.5% body fat. Im at nearly 400 lbs now. I didnt even have to change my diet. :blank:
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: iri on Fri, 22 November 2013, 04:24:36: I lost 13 kilos in a month after breaking up with my ex.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: stancato9 on Fri, 22 November 2013, 04:37:47: Quote from: kolonelkadat on Fri, 22 November 2013, 04:21:29
Crippling depression is great for packing on the pounds. I was 225 with 9.5% body fat. Im at nearly 400 lbs now. I didnt even have to change my diet. :blank:

That's what made me stop going to the gym. Although I didn't gain too much weight I lost a **** ton of muscle.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: tp4tissue on Fri, 22 November 2013, 07:05:36: Way to kill the thread guys... (http://www.cute-factor.com/images/smilies/onion/073.gif)
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: SpAmRaY on Fri, 22 November 2013, 07:06:48: Quote from: iri on Fri, 22 November 2013, 03:09:50
my dieting tips #432: drink only diet coke when eating those six royal cheeseburgers.

But.....but....I actually prefer the taste of diet soda :o

Also the #1 way to get fat is to sit around and do nothing all the time, I have plenty of experience in that, obviously. :-X
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: foxer on Fri, 22 November 2013, 07:11:08: Quote from: demik on Fri, 22 November 2013, 00:41:18
Show Image
(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-l3L_Gn16ANQ/UKUM-u2nsTI/AAAAAAAAB94/AnUyhG0oBAY/s1600/IMG_2644.JPG)

this.

**** you costco for introducing this into my life.

I love that stuff although it's a different brand in the UK. I make some toast, butter it and lay a few slices on top. The mix of the cold turkey slice and hot toast makes it soooo good.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: absyrd on Fri, 22 November 2013, 07:19:31: Quit smoking. I quit and gained over 15 lbs in a month.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: fohat.digs on Fri, 22 November 2013, 07:41:59: Everything you consume after 9:00pm is likely to turn to fat.

Eat a healthy dinner, even have a couple of drinks, but limit it to water for the last few hours.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: iri on Fri, 22 November 2013, 08:38:33: i usually limit it to beer for the last five hours.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: Computer-Lab in Basement on Fri, 22 November 2013, 08:42:45: Make many, many McGangBangs...

(http://www.eatmedaily.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/mcgangbang.jpg)

And now I'm hungry...
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: tp4tissue on Fri, 22 November 2013, 08:46:15: Quote from: Computer-Lab in Basement on Fri, 22 November 2013, 08:42:45
Make many, many McGangBangs...

Show Image
(http://www.eatmedaily.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/mcgangbang.jpg)

And now I'm hungry...

Oh man.. I've eaten so many of those @ my high-school cafeteria. they always have chicken and regular, I've always had 4 or so in highschool at the same time..
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: SpAmRaY on Fri, 22 November 2013, 08:53:06: Quote from: Computer-Lab in Basement on Fri, 22 November 2013, 08:42:45
Make many, many McGangBangs...

And now I'm hungry...

Why have I never thought about just buying 3 dollar menu burgers and combining them :o
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: iri on Fri, 22 November 2013, 09:34:12: Quote from: bueller on Thu, 21 November 2013, 23:36:44
Quote from: digi on Thu, 21 November 2013, 23:28:45
beer
beer
and more beer

This. Back when I was a drinker I was always overweight, since I quit in March I've lost 25KG (55lbs for you yanks).
impressive. did you give up only beer, or alcohol in general?
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: Computer-Lab in Basement on Fri, 22 November 2013, 09:41:25: Quote from: SpAmRaY on Fri, 22 November 2013, 08:53:06
Quote from: Computer-Lab in Basement on Fri, 22 November 2013, 08:42:45
Make many, many McGangBangs...

And now I'm hungry...

Why have I never thought about just buying 3 dollar menu burgers and combining them :o

It's the cheapest meal you can buy from McDonalds. I get it every time I go there. $2 + tax, or in my state, $2.33 total (the jacked up McDouble prices, them bastards...)
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: xmagusx on Fri, 22 November 2013, 12:43:12: Ergonomics.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: hcry4 on Fri, 22 November 2013, 13:58:32: Consuming a lot of sugar and carbs helps. High fat foods do not necessarily make you fat though. Also, I love diet soda.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: C5Allroad on Fri, 22 November 2013, 20:14:52: A slow metabolism usually works. You don't want to stock up on sugers too quickly or else DIABEEETUSSS
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: Asininity on Fri, 22 November 2013, 23:27:25: A bottle of wine, blasting Carly Ray Jepson, and finishing off a big bag of Cheez-Its.

That's my Friday.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: Malphas on Sat, 23 November 2013, 08:01:45: Quote from: fohat.digs on Fri, 22 November 2013, 07:41:59
Everything you consume after 9:00pm is likely to turn to fat.

Eat a healthy dinner, even have a couple of drinks, but limit it to water for the last few hours.
Fat (as in adipose tissue) is just a buffer though, so it doesn't actually make a great deal of difference when you eat, if total caloric intake is the same. But yes, in terms of satiety management and energy levels it makes sense to eat less when your activity drops.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: Findecanor on Sat, 23 November 2013, 10:36:00: Quote from: absyrd on Fri, 22 November 2013, 07:19:31
Quit smoking. I quit and gained over 15 lbs in a month.
BTW, smoking does not keep you thin. It is the transition from smoking to not smoking that causes it. When you smoke, nicotine causes the blood vessels to contract - which the body adapts to compensate for. When you quit nicotine, the body overcompensates for a period, widening the blood vessels releasing more free energy into the blood stream.

I'm just writing this for any ignorant teens who have considered to start smoking to loose weight - it doesn't work.
The time you quit smoking is a great time to start going to the gym - you will have energy that you would otherwise not have.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: davkol on Sat, 23 November 2013, 12:11:07: I wish I knew.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: Malphas on Sat, 23 November 2013, 12:48:10: Quote from: Findecanor on Sat, 23 November 2013, 10:36:00
Quote from: absyrd on Fri, 22 November 2013, 07:19:31
Quit smoking. I quit and gained over 15 lbs in a month.
BTW, smoking does not keep you thin. It is the transition from smoking to not smoking that causes it. When you smoke, nicotine causes the blood vessels to contract - which the body adapts to compensate for. When you quit nicotine, the body overcompensates for a period, widening the blood vessels releasing more free energy into the blood stream.

I'm just writing this for any ignorant teens who have considered to start smoking to loose weight - it doesn't work.
The time you quit smoking is a great time to start going to the gym - you will have energy that you would otherwise not have.

Nicotine is well known and clinically proven to raise metabolic rate and suppress appetite, so actually smoking does help you stay thin.

I'm not contesting what you're saying about the effect of blood vessels widening because I've never heard that argument before, but it sounds highly infeasible to be honest. I have no idea what "free energy" would mean in this context or how it could exist in the body without already contributing to your weight.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: Doppelganger on Sat, 23 November 2013, 13:55:46: Quote from: digi on Thu, 21 November 2013, 23:28:45
beer
beer
and more beer

This, lol. Also add pizza, hot wings, cuban sandwiches and more pizza.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: eth0s on Sat, 23 November 2013, 15:17:54: Sarah Palin said all Americans "have a right to be fat".

(http://i.i.cbsi.com/cnwk.1d/i/tim//2010/08/31/overeat-kid-doughnut-512_1.jpg)

So go to McDonalds and exercise your 'Murican rights.

(http://31.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lxtp9eNmIr1qi494to1_500.gif)

And remember kids, it doesn't matter what you eat, as long as you exercise.

(http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m3qcg7qBgi1rvv4qxo1_400.gif)
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: noisyturtle on Sat, 23 November 2013, 17:47:28: As someone who has put on 60lbs over the past 3 years, I can tell you the key to getting fat is ordering delivery food often and hating exercise.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: tp4tissue on Sat, 23 November 2013, 18:31:09: Quote from: noisyturtle on Sat, 23 November 2013, 17:47:28
As someone who has put on 60lbs over the past 3 years, I can tell you the key to getting fat is ordering delivery food often and hating exercise.

I've h8 exercise ever since forever... because that's how long I've had video games...

Good thing I'm Sooooh! incredibly lazy.. that I don't even pick up the phone to order takeout..(http://www.cute-factor.com/images/smilies/onion/8f337f1c.gif)
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: MTManiac on Sat, 23 November 2013, 18:37:26: wish i could gain weight
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: jinxedx84 on Sat, 23 November 2013, 18:43:21: quoted from the simpson's episode 135 - "king size homer"

Dr. Nick: Hi everybody!
Homer+Bart: Hi Doctor Nick!
Nick: Now there are many options available for dangerously
underweighted individuals like yourself. I recommend a slow
steady gorging process combined with assal horizontology.
Homer: [pensive] Of course.
Nick: [points to a chart] You'll want to focus on the neglected
food groups such as the whipped group, the congealed group
and the chocotastic!
Homer: What can I do to speed the whole thing up, Doctor?
Nick: Well...be creative. Instead of making sandwiches with
bread, use poptarts. Instead of chewing gum, chew bacon,
heh...
Bart: You could brush your teeth with milkshakes!
Dr. Nick: Hey, did you go to Hollywood Upstairs Medical College too?
And remember, if you're not sure about something, rub it
against a piece of paper. If the paper turns clear, it's
your window to weight gain. Bye bye, everybody
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: Trent on Sat, 23 November 2013, 20:42:39: It isn't in my fridge, but is darn good.

Fluff ;D

(http://dealbreaker.com/uploads/2013/06/marshmallow-fluff.jpg)
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: tp4tissue on Sat, 23 November 2013, 20:56:00: Quote from: Trent on Sat, 23 November 2013, 20:42:39
It isn't in my fridge, but is darn good.

Fluff ;D

Show Image
(http://dealbreaker.com/uploads/2013/06/marshmallow-fluff.jpg)

(http://www.cute-factor.com/images/smilies/onion/6f428754.gif)
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: zoolzoo on Sun, 24 November 2013, 07:50:44: Ayinging Celebrator. Tastes like a 300 calorie beer to me.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: fohat.digs on Sun, 24 November 2013, 14:06:58: Quote from: MTManiac on Sat, 23 November 2013, 18:37:26
I wish i could gain weight

Clearly, you are still in the first half of your lifetime.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: SUPER432 on Wed, 27 November 2013, 01:32:30: A sedentary lifestyle.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: tp4tissue on Wed, 27 November 2013, 05:17:53: Also.. granola bars... nothing good for you can be so delicious... Oh man..... So much crunchy goodness.

(http://www.freesmileys.org/emoticons/tuzki-bunnys/tuzki-bunny-emoticon-024.gif)
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: YoungMichael88 on Wed, 27 November 2013, 05:38:13: Cheese. And lots of it!!
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: tp4tissue on Wed, 27 November 2013, 05:41:25: Quote from: YoungMichael88 on Wed, 27 November 2013, 05:38:13
Cheese. And lots of it!!

I started eating so much more cheese when I got the food processor that has the cheese grater wheel.

(http://www.cute-factor.com/images/smilies/onion/8f337f1c.gif)
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: davkol on Wed, 27 November 2013, 09:16:11: Quote from: YoungMichael88 on Wed, 27 November 2013, 05:38:13
Cheese. And lots of it!!

I'm still anything but fat.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: hcry4 on Wed, 27 November 2013, 09:19:56: I lost weight eating cheese.
Title: Re: Keys to getting fat
Post by: iri on Wed, 27 November 2013, 09:58:59: i wish i could donate my belly to davkol.