Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:37:01
Post by: Lurch on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:37:36
Post by: Hexterdude on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:40:21
Under the law of Mississippi, there’s no such thing as a female Peeping Tom
Post by: 1swt2gs on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:42:24
There are 118 ridges around the edge of a Roosevelt dime, 119 ridges around the edge of a quarter, and 150 ridges around the edge of a Kennedy half dollar.
Post by: FreeCopy on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:43:19
What did Tennessee?
More
The same thing Arkansas
That's probably worse than the time I farted so hard I had to crab walk to the bathroom for a shower and a change of clothes.
Post by: Bromono on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:43:41
Post by: Hexterdude on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:44:24
Ready for an amazing joke?
What did Tennessee?MoreThe same thing Arkansas
That's probably worse than the time I farted so hard I had to crab walk to the bathroom for a shower and a change of clothes.
That joke gave me cancer
Post by: byker on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:47:30
Post by: Jema on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:47:37
(http://i.imgur.com/65MgdzN.gif)
Giving platelets is painful I'm told! I tried to donate but they wouldn't let me :( Well fine then I'll keep them all to myself!
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:51:43
Haha these facts and jokes are amusing.
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:53:55
Neeeed moooooaarrr bloooood
Post by: absyrd on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:54:41
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:54:47
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:55:12
All ur platelets are belongz to Deztiny
Destiny can have them! ^.^
Post by: Computer-Lab in Basement on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:55:16
Post by: absyrd on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:56:05
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:56:38
hi hoff
Hey hofmeester
hi hoff!
Haiiiiii
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:58:18
I wonder... because of your size, do you give extra?
I dunno! I am giving what they call a "double". But there are various sizes of "doubles".
/me wishes he spoke the language of the streets
Post by: Lurch on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:58:54
Post by: absyrd on Mon, 16 November 2015, 17:58:58
You'll be extra loopy.
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:00:11
It doesn't like me
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:00:59
Make it a double at the bar afterwards.
You'll be extra loopy.
Post-double double for double the double!
Post by: absyrd on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:01:59
Post by: Lurch on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:04:25
Dis mah machine
It doesn't like me
looks dreadful but we still like you :D
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:05:01
Why you like getting vampired so much?
Cause people need the 'lets more than me!
'Lets is the slang for platelets that I just made up, btw.
Post by: absyrd on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:07:41
Post by: inanis on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:11:24
Why you like getting vampired so much?The goth me likes this so much. Next time I go to give blood I'm using this line. It is mine now!
Hi Hoff!
Post by: absyrd on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:12:54
Why you like getting vampired so much?The goth me likes this so much. Next time I go to give blood I'm using this line. It is mine now!
Hi Hoff!
Destiny call the IV team vampires... then she started doing it to any and all nurses and docs that stuck her. I think I taught her a bad thing.
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:15:11
Why you like getting vampired so much?The goth me likes this so much. Next time I go to give blood I'm using this line. It is mine now!
Hi Hoff!
Destiny call the IV team vampires... then she started doing it to any and all nurses and docs that stuck her. I think I taught her a bad thing.
LOL I think they'll forgive her. ;)
That is funny though, you're a bad influence! :P
And hi in-anus!
Post by: absyrd on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:15:34
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:17:26
Why the **** are cats so scared of cucumbers?
:eek:
What are you doing to your cat??
That's not where cucumbers go, absyrd...
Post by: absyrd on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:20:13
Why the **** are cats so scared of cucumbers?
:eek:
What are you doing to your cat??
That's not where cucumbers go, absyrd...
Quick change my forum name to mianis.
Post by: katushkin on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:23:09
It wants 7.3x10^11 of these suckers. :eek:
What units is that in? Centimetres?
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:26:24
It wants 7.3x10^11 of these suckers. :eek:
What units is that in? Centimetres?
I asked them and they don't know. It's clearly not anything on a visible scale cause I assure you I do not have trillions of cenimetres, millilitres, or anything of that sort in my body. I know I'm big, but not that big!
I can only assume it is literally the number of platelets.
Post by: absyrd on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:28:56
It wants 7.3x10^11 of these suckers. :eek:
What units is that in? Centimetres?
I asked them and they don't know. It's clearly not anything on a visible scale cause I assure you I do not have trillions of cenimetres, millilitres, or anything of that sort in my body. I know I'm big, but not that big!
I can only assume it is literally the number of platelets.
Sounds right.
Pocket a few bags because I'm bout to drink a ton of booze and play with a chainsaw.
Post by: inanis on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:30:00
And hi in-anus!
You're lucky I like you...
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:30:28
It wants 7.3x10^11 of these suckers. :eek:
What units is that in? Centimetres?
I asked them and they don't know. It's clearly not anything on a visible scale cause I assure you I do not have trillions of cenimetres, millilitres, or anything of that sort in my body. I know I'm big, but not that big!
I can only assume it is literally the number of platelets.
Sounds right.
Pocket a few bags because I'm bout to drink a ton of booze and play with a chainsaw.
Nooooo, the lil 'lets will die before they get to you anyway!
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:31:14
Can't push em out fast enough!
Post by: absyrd on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:32:19
You don't want your 'lets to give you a 'roid.
Then your 'roid won't clot because you don't have 'lets.
Post by: katushkin on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:33:19
Make sure you ask for a lollipop when you are done :P
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:33:55
Don't push too hard.
You don't want your 'lets to give you a 'roid.
Then your 'roid won't clot because you don't have 'lets.
Pushing gives me steroids??
Post by: absyrd on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:34:51
I meant 'rhoids.
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:35:38
Damnit.
I meant 'rhoids.
Ah. Sterhoids.
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:36:43
Don't push.
Make sure you ask for a lollipop when you are done :P
Don't worry I've already gotten two cookies and a cup of juice.
️
Post by: absyrd on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:38:03
Post by: katushkin on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:38:51
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:39:30
I'm ****ING SORRY. I've never had to spell out hemorrhoids in my life. Forgive me. And the best part was just typing in "h-e-m" it was the first result in google.
It's all your fault
>:D
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:41:55
So how come you are donating so much blood?
I'm donatin' platelets, son! Read da OP. >:D
And because I don't need 'em and there's a shortage right now. But I'd donate regardless.
Post by: katushkin on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:50:53
So how come you are donating so much blood?
I'm donatin' platelets, son! Read da OP. >:D
And because I don't need 'em and there's a shortage right now. But I'd donate regardless.
Only platelets? Why don't they just take blood instead? =/ Why would you need one and not the other anyway?
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:53:22
So how come you are donating so much blood?
I'm donatin' platelets, son! Read da OP. >:D
And because I don't need 'em and there's a shortage right now. But I'd donate regardless.
Only platelets? Why don't they just take blood instead? =/ Why would you need one and not the other anyway?
I believe that to get this quantity of platelets would be more blood removed than is healthy. Yknow?
Plus this allows you to donate more frequently.
Post by: VesperSAINT on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:53:37
Makes a hell much more sense now. LOL!!!
Good guy Hoff doing goodness for society ~ Typical. Pffffff~ What's new...
Edit: New page get. GET GOOD, KIDS.
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:54:32
So how come you are donating so much blood?
I'm donatin' platelets, son! Read da OP. >:D
And because I don't need 'em and there's a shortage right now. But I'd donate regardless.
Only platelets? Why don't they just take blood instead? =/ Why would you need one and not the other anyway?
Oh and platelets are given to cancer patients most of the time. As opposed to blood which is more for trauma and blood loss.
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:56:01
"Only have one hand (not what you think!)" - Hoffbae
Makes a hell much more sense now. LOL!!!
Good guy Hoff doing goodness for society ~ Typical. Pffffff~ What's new...
Edit: New page get. GET GOOD, KIDS.
Haiiiii VesperBae!!~
Only 32 minutes left!
Join the party
Post by: VesperSAINT on Mon, 16 November 2015, 18:58:10
Haiiiii VesperBae!!~
Only 32 minutes left!
Join the party
More than enough time, if ya know what I mean ;)
Oh and platelets are given to cancer patients most of the time. As opposed to blood which is more for trauma and blood loss.
Calling out for discriminating against trauma and blood loss patients!!!
(https://31.media.tumblr.com/77acd17b281bf6c3a7cdf91948d6586a/tumblr_msgj86IYEa1sz7wa1o1_400.gif)
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:00:32
Haiiiii VesperBae!!~
Only 32 minutes left!
Join the party
More than enough time, if ya know what I mean ;)Oh and platelets are given to cancer patients most of the time. As opposed to blood which is more for trauma and blood loss.
Calling out for discriminating against trauma and blood loss patients!!!Show Image(https://31.media.tumblr.com/77acd17b281bf6c3a7cdf91948d6586a/tumblr_msgj86IYEa1sz7wa1o1_400.gif)
can't win!And
️
Post by: jerue on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:01:18
I just got a haircut, I always feel like I can never move when I get one.
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:01:34
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:02:47
Hey, you're almost done!
I just got a haircut, I always feel like I can never move when I get one.
That's because you can't! Or else they cut off yer ears! Like in Reservoir Dogs.
Post by: VesperSAINT on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:06:01
And
GG NO RE.
Mmmmmmmmmmmmm
You gon' git fat, dawg.
Hey, you're almost done!
I just got a haircut, I always feel like I can never move when I get one.
That's because you can't! Or else they cut off yer ears! Like in Reservoir Dogs.
I've had this actually happen to me before... I think the lady once was trimming hair near my ears with scissors and then I sneezed... wasn't pleasant... luckily it was a tiny lil' snip.
I need to watch this movie again. It's been too long since I last saw it.
Post by: thelectronicnub on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:07:43
https://imgur.com/a/yMbQS
Post by: VesperSAINT on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:09:41
i hope this entertains you hoff
https://imgur.com/a/yMbQS
Thank you for these. Dog series and Hilary vs. Trump was good.
inb4 you ain't hoffbae
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:10:27
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:12:56
i hope this entertains you hoff
https://imgur.com/a/yMbQS
I giggled. :D
Post by: billnye on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:13:14
Post by: VesperSAINT on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:17:00
Hey hoff how's Green Bay doing?
(https://media.giphy.com/media/o8T8Gs3Ct4U5W/giphy.gif)
Post by: katushkin on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:19:24
Hey hoff how's Green Bay doing?Show Image(https://media.giphy.com/media/o8T8Gs3Ct4U5W/giphy.gif)
Aren't they undefea- oh...
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:19:36
Hey hoff how's Green Bay doing?
Same as always, I assume. I haven't been up there in awhile. Nice city though. :)
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:25:56
Post by: Hexterdude on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:30:10
Post by: VesperSAINT on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:31:23
Aren't they undefea- oh...
Huehuehue.
So many platelets...
(http://replygif.net/i/960.gif)
Post by: ApocalypseMaow on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:32:47
Mmmmmmmmmmmmm#worth
Post by: jaffers on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:36:18
Post by: jaffers on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:36:44
So many platelets...
Why is your blood yellow
Post by: rowdy on Mon, 16 November 2015, 19:38:39
Also they are called platelets because the microscopes in use back then couldn't show that much detail, and they looked like discs, or plates.
I wonder if where are cuplets, saucerlets and bowllets too?
Post by: HoffmanMyster on Mon, 16 November 2015, 20:12:33
Have you started hallucinating yet?
Only a little bit. :confused:
Mmmmmmmmmmmmm#worth
#worth#worth
Hey Hoffmayne
haiiiiiii ^.^
So many platelets...
Why is your blood yellow
Those are platelets, breh! They centrifugate (yes that's a made up form of that verb) the blood to extract the various parts. The platelets are collected and everything else is returned to meeeeeee.
I'm probably way too late, but how often do you hear someone use the word "stave"?
Also they are called platelets because the microscopes in use back then couldn't show that much detail, and they looked like discs, or plates.
I wonder if where are cuplets, saucerlets and bowllets too?
I would like to donate cuplets, please. :))
Post by: ander on Tue, 17 November 2015, 02:04:13
Post by: rowdy on Tue, 17 November 2015, 03:33:00
I'm probably way too late, but how often do you hear someone use the word "stave"?
Also they are called platelets because the microscopes in use back then couldn't show that much detail, and they looked like discs, or plates.
I wonder if where are cuplets, saucerlets and bowllets too?
I would like to donate cuplets, please. :))
I knew a girl once who had really cute cuplets :)
Post by: arcvile on Tue, 17 November 2015, 11:25:48
Show Image(http://s2.quickmeme.com/img/04/040e5c5987d7f3a97a3476c044745ba8c3c0f2d8bbf195b94abc240431091e11.jpg)
Fear the clots!