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geekhack Community => Off Topic => Topic started by: ander on Tue, 17 November 2015, 02:40:27

Title: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: ander on Tue, 17 November 2015, 02:40:27
Acer Live Chat – Request to Chat
 
The chat form asks me to enter a bunch of info—product serial number, product number, name, email address, chat subject. Then in the "Question" box, I type:

"How can I completely turn off the vibrator in my phone? I don’t need it or want it. I've turned off all the vibrator settings I can find, but the phone still vibrates—for example, whenever I turn it on or off, and someone calls when I’m composing a text."
 
Please wait while we connect you to the chat server.
 
Searching for an available agent. You are currently number 6 in the queue. You should be connected to an agent in about 25:53. The average amount of time a customer has to wait is 26:16.
 
[20-odd minutes later:]

Status: Connected
 
Agent: Hi, my name is [agent's name]. How may I help you?
 
Me: I already typed my question in your Chat Request form. Don't you see it?

[No reply]
 
Me: I guess I can copy it and paste it again here, but it seems rather silly... Why would they make us type it in the first form if you can't see it?
 
Agent: Hello, Andy.
 
Me: नमस्ते <--[Note to forum: This is me being a smartass and pasting “Hello” in Hindi, which I copied from Google Translate]
 
Agent: I understand your concern. However let me help you to get the issue resolved.
 
Me: Please don't use macros like that on me, OK? I'm a technical writer. Thanks!
 
Agent: I understand that you want to turn off Vibrate mode in your phone, am I correct?
 
Me: Ah, good, you could see my question after all.
 
[No activity for about 1 minute]
 
Me: Hello? Are you there?
 
Agent: Did you turn off from the settings?
 
Me: Oh—I got the idea you could see my question. Well, as I wrote in it: "I've turned off all the vibrator settings I can find, but the phone still vibrates..."
 
[Another long pause; the chat window says “Agent: (listening)”]
 
Me: Does "Listening" mean you're waiting for me to type something else?
 
Agent: I am sorry for that, in that case I suggest you to do factory reset once. Please do reset and check for issue. During the process, all data stored on your computer will be overwritten. This means all your files, such as email and photos, will be erased.
 
Me: You're telling me to erase my entire phone? Is that the only possible fix? Maybe I'm just overlooking a setting somewhere. Aren’t we even going to check that? I'd rather not reset my phone unnecessarily.
 
Agent: Since you tried already from settings, we have only option for reset.
 
Me: But you haven’t even told me where the possible vibration settings are. Could we check those first?
 
Agent: Since you mention that you turned off from settings, I suggest for further troubleshooting steps.
 
Me: Okay, I’m looking in the settings. In “Sound and Notification”, I see only this: "Also vibrate for calls" (it’s turned off). Are there any other places where vibration can be turned off? I'd just like to verify that before I go to the trouble of erasing and reinstalling my whole phone.
 
Agent: Vibration setting will be in different place for different function.
 
Me: Indeed, that's why I'm asking you. You're the expert. Your company made this phone. So I'm assuming you know where these settings are. This is why I waited 20 minutes to chat with you.
 
Agent: We have keyboard vibration settings.
 
Me: Sorry?
 
Agent: First access your settings via your preferred method and scroll down to the Personal section, then tap on “Language and input.”
 
Agent: We see that our current keyboard is the Google Keyboard, which you can change (such as to one of the aforementioned alternatives) by tapping on “Current Keyboard.” To change the current keyboard’s settings, you want to tap on it, so in this example, we’d tap on “Google Keyboard.”
 
Me: But the phone doesn't vibrate when I use the keyboard. If it did, I certainly would've mentioned it. So I don't understand how this could be relevant.
 
Me: Okay, I’ve opened the Google Keyboard settings. There’s one reference to vibration: “Vibrate on keypress”. It’s turned off.
 
Agent: Go to the settings icon, Sound and touch Vibrate menu. There you see on and off for Vibration.
 
Me: Yes—as I've already explained, the only vibration setting there is "Also vibrate for calls", which I’ve turned off.
 
Agent: Okay. Could you please check whether yo get vibrate when you receive calls and while you type?
 
Me: Well, as I've just told you, the phone doesn’t vibrate when I type.
 
Agent: You can try call your phone from other phone and see whether you get vibrate or not.
 
Me: But it doesn’t vibrate every time it rings, only if someone calls while I’m writing a text. But sure, I'll ask my friend to call me now.
 
Agent: Okay.
 
Me: No, it just rings; there's no vibration. That’s what it always does. If it vibrated on every ring, I certainly would've mentioned that.
 
Me: It seems like you're just guessing here. Maybe I should have tried the user forums.
 
Agent: Okay.
 
Me: I have one other question: In Settings > “Sound and notification”, I keep finding that my Ring volume has been set back to 0, even though I didn’t change it. I've missed a lot of calls because of this. Why does it keep resetting itself, and how can I fix it?
 
[Pause]
 
Me: I have a feeling you're going to suggest I reset my phone...
 
Agent: Is that ring volume automatically set to 0?
 
Me: I don't understand. Is that any different from finding that the Ring Volume has reset itself to 0, as I just explained?
 
Agent: The ring volume does not change unless you change the setting.
 
Me: [sigh]
 
Me: Sorry, but this is the goofiest support chat I've ever had. I’ll have to post it on one of the forums I go to. At least it may provide some entertainment value there. Thanks anyway—bye!
 
Chat ended. Thank you for using Acer Support Live Chat!
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: 1swt2gs on Tue, 17 November 2015, 02:50:13
You are so evil lol.
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: Coreda on Tue, 17 November 2015, 03:21:15
Quote from: ander on Tue, 17 November 2015, 02:40:27
Me: Please don't use macros like that on me, OK? I'm a technical writer. Thanks!

(http://i.imgur.com/KOgMrlm.jpg)
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: rowdy on Tue, 17 November 2015, 03:31:25
Almost seems like an AI responding to you.

Scary thought - we are probably not that far off from such a thing.
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: hudson0804 on Tue, 17 November 2015, 03:40:18
I love those "technical" representatives.  In my line of work i spend a lot of time speaking/messaging them and do enjoy torturing the blatant script monkeys.   

In relevance, I had the same issue with an android phone a while back, if i remember rightly its a notification vibration option?  try something along the lines of Home screen >> Messaging >> Tap on Menu >> Tap on Notification settings >> vibrate alerts or something along those lines....
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: SpAmRaY on Tue, 17 November 2015, 06:21:42
Acer makes phones? :eek:
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: baldgye on Tue, 17 November 2015, 06:35:02
I've had similar experiences with BT Internet support that resulted in them calling me at after 10pm (while I was in bed) after I told them not too call me under any circumstances...
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: ander on Tue, 17 November 2015, 17:48:17
Quote from: Coreda on Tue, 17 November 2015, 03:21:15
Quote from: ander on Tue, 17 November 2015, 02:40:27
Me: Please don't use macros like that on me, OK? I'm a technical writer. Thanks!

Show Image
(http://i.imgur.com/KOgMrlm.jpg)

LOL—so who's the monkey, me or him?

Quote from: rowdy on Tue, 17 November 2015, 03:31:25
Almost seems like an AI responding to you.
I agree, except for the "intelligence" part.

BTW, I also posted this on the Acer support forum, thinking they'd appreciate seeing what's happening to their customers who just want to ask some simple questions about their products. Instead of acknowledging the problem, and maybe even apologizing for wasting half an hour of my time—that would've been impressive—they deleted it and sent me a message explaining it hadn't "met forum standards". Apparently they're more concerned about avoiding embarrassment than improving their customer support.
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: katushkin on Tue, 17 November 2015, 17:52:59
If you treat tech support like ****, they will treat you like ****.

Source: Am tech support. If you start straight out like a smart-ass, we aren't going to do anything to help you.

You have to think that there are probably only half a dozen max tech support guys using the live chat stuff, and they probably have four or five people going at any one time, searching for solutions, and doing whatever else.
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: suicidal_orange on Tue, 17 November 2015, 18:01:56
Quote from: baldgye on Tue, 17 November 2015, 06:35:02
I've had similar experiences with BT Internet support that resulted in them calling me at after 10pm (while I was in bed) after I told them not too call me under any circumstances...

I had a couple of day e-mail conversation with BT when my broadband speed dropped to near zero, in the end I resorted to suggesting that "my neighbour's microwave might have exploded causing a genetic mutation in my internal wiring."  Surprisingly the issue was progressed to someone with a better grasp of English and my problem was fixed the next day, without the need for anyone to visit my house to move my router from where it had been sat for years without issue to the master socket as I refused to do.

I think an AI could have done better than first line tech support!
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: inanis on Tue, 17 November 2015, 18:04:45
Quote from: katushkin on Tue, 17 November 2015, 17:52:59
If you treat tech support like ****, they will treat you like ****.
QFT

I worked on a help desk for a long time, and if someone called in saying they were smarter than me right off the bat, they were not likly to have a good experiance. I once had an Engineer tell me (as he refered to me as "sweetheart") that he would wait for a "real IT person" to show up. I hung up on him, I'm not here to be talked down to. When he called back in later, and someone else took the call, I was the person that went to his desk to fix his issue.  :rolleyes:
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: njbair on Tue, 17 November 2015, 18:07:17
The Apple version:

Apple: Hi, njbair! How was your dinner at Davitino's last night?

Me: What? How did you know I ate at Davitino's?

Apple: What? Oh, nevermind. Lucky guess, I suppose.

(silence)

Apple: So...

Apple: How can we help you today?

Me: I want to turn off vibrate on my phone.

Apple: No you don't.

Me: What?

Me: Yes I do.

Apple: No you don't.

(silence)

Me: Yes I do.

Apple: Ok. Let me just check something with my supervisor. Do you mind hanging on for just a few minutes?

Me: Sure.

(3-4 minutes of silence)

Apple: Ok, I'm back. Sorry for the delay.

Me: No problem.

Apple: I checked with my supervisor and he's pretty sure you don't want to turn the vibrate off on your phone.




Sorry, that's all I've got.
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: hwood34 on Tue, 17 November 2015, 18:09:47
So you thought starting off being an ******* was gonna get you somewhere?

This also seems like a very google-able question, which is all tech support at a large company like that is gonna do anyway.
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: katushkin on Tue, 17 November 2015, 18:11:27
Basically, after the first two lines you sent to the support guy, I would have written the conversation off as you being an arrogant so and so, and I would have tried to keep you on the chat as long as possible without helping you because while you have the benefit of not having the human interaction, it also means we can be cold as **** towards you.

So I wouldn't say it was inane, I would say you were getting your just desserts.

Quote from: hwood34 on Tue, 17 November 2015, 18:09:47
So you thought starting off being an ******* was gonna get you somewhere?

I was gonna use the C word, but that works.
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: Coreda on Tue, 17 November 2015, 19:47:11
Quote from: ander on Tue, 17 November 2015, 17:48:17
LOL—so who's the monkey, me or him?

(http://i.imgur.com/CJuVcT5.gif)

Just found the line amusing for a tech support call :p

Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: rowdy on Tue, 17 November 2015, 20:01:09
Quote from: katushkin on Tue, 17 November 2015, 17:52:59
If you treat tech support like ****, they will treat you like ****.

Source: Am tech support. If you start straight out like a smart-ass, we aren't going to do anything to help you.

You have to think that there are probably only half a dozen max tech support guys using the live chat stuff, and they probably have four or five people going at any one time, searching for solutions, and doing whatever else.

Agree.

But this one sounded like a drone reading off a standard list.  Deviate from the steps and they need to ask their supervisor what to do.
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: katushkin on Tue, 17 November 2015, 20:06:37
Quote from: rowdy on Tue, 17 November 2015, 20:01:09
Quote from: katushkin on Tue, 17 November 2015, 17:52:59
If you treat tech support like ****, they will treat you like ****.

Source: Am tech support. If you start straight out like a smart-ass, we aren't going to do anything to help you.

You have to think that there are probably only half a dozen max tech support guys using the live chat stuff, and they probably have four or five people going at any one time, searching for solutions, and doing whatever else.

Agree.

But this one sounded like a drone reading off a standard list.  Deviate from the steps and they need to ask their supervisor what to do.

Yes, true. But as I have discovered in the past, some people who call up tech support aren't quite as technically minded as they think they are, and you have to start from the very beginning and run through literally everything.

"Is your Caps Lock on?" is a good one...
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: rowdy on Wed, 18 November 2015, 03:45:43
Quote from: katushkin on Tue, 17 November 2015, 20:06:37
Quote from: rowdy on Tue, 17 November 2015, 20:01:09
Quote from: katushkin on Tue, 17 November 2015, 17:52:59
If you treat tech support like ****, they will treat you like ****.

Source: Am tech support. If you start straight out like a smart-ass, we aren't going to do anything to help you.

You have to think that there are probably only half a dozen max tech support guys using the live chat stuff, and they probably have four or five people going at any one time, searching for solutions, and doing whatever else.

Agree.

But this one sounded like a drone reading off a standard list.  Deviate from the steps and they need to ask their supervisor what to do.

Yes, true. But as I have discovered in the past, some people who call up tech support aren't quite as technically minded as they think they are, and you have to start from the very beginning and run through literally everything.

"Is your Caps Lock on?" is a good one...

I've ended up sort of doing tech support for some of our clients, although we don't generally have a lot of calls like that as each client has their own first call help desk, and they contact us if they can't help.

I've had some weird ones though, and sometimes the same question comes up over and over again from the same person.

I try to inject some humour into my responses.  Usually it goes down well.
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: jamster on Wed, 18 November 2015, 06:42:28
Well, you managed to come across as a smartarse straight off the bat, and also managed to infer that you use your phone like a sex toy, so I'm not surprised that the conversation went downhill from there.
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: baldgye on Wed, 18 November 2015, 06:50:21
Quote from: katushkin on Tue, 17 November 2015, 18:11:27
Basically, after the first two lines you sent to the support guy, I would have written the conversation off as you being an arrogant so and so, and I would have tried to keep you on the chat as long as possible without helping you because while you have the benefit of not having the human interaction, it also means we can be cold as **** towards you.

So I wouldn't say it was inane, I would say you were getting your just desserts.

Quote from: hwood34 on Tue, 17 November 2015, 18:09:47
So you thought starting off being an ******* was gonna get you somewhere?

I was gonna use the C word, but that works.


yeah I just re-read the opening part to the chat he dumped, like you want this person to help you... your not exactly endearing yourself to someone by being such an ass up front.
Be friendly, at the end of the day it's a **** job and any job in which you have to deal with the public for help/support is terrible (from experience).
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: Nai_Calus on Wed, 18 November 2015, 19:42:39
Yeah when I was doing tech support the fastest way to get me to do the absolute minimum to help you was to be a condescending jackass right off the bat.

Now I have had people call in and be 'I know what I'm doing better than you do' right off the bat without it being condescending. Someone called in once stating a couple of devices needed to be sent in for repairs, told me what they'd done to troubleshoot it and the results, and their repairs got set up quickly without any bull**** script timewasting because they 1. weren't ****s 2. really did know what they were doing.

But the people who want to speak to a 'real tech support person'? Oh the fun I will politely have with you.

Alternately if you're not a jerk and demonstrate being able to listen, even if you're the most technologically clueless person on the planet, I will cheerfully and patiently lead you through the most irritatingly technical things to get you going. Like resetting an admin password on a computer they didn't know the OS X version of other than that it was probably Snow Leopard or Lion based on the age. No disks huh? Congratulations you get to Single User mode reset because I trust you to type in what I tell you to, rather than making you go into a store and maybe lose your data to the 'genius' bar. Oh, that didn't work, so it's Lion after all, you just don't have a recovery partition, no problem, type this in, now let's do that reset password thing again. Heyo, it works now, congrats, thanks for your patience and listening skills, nice lady. We are both having a better night because of this call. Go you.

I mean sure you may well have been a condescending douche to someone who really was an idiot, but you're also the kind of person we snarked about between calls rofl.
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: tbc on Fri, 20 November 2015, 03:28:36
Quote from: jamster on Wed, 18 November 2015, 06:42:28
Well, you managed to come across as a smartarse straight off the bat, and also managed to infer that you use your phone like a sex toy, so I'm not surprised that the conversation went downhill from there.

if this chat is real, i'd imagine it's on a 'techsupport staff support group' thread already lol.
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: sth on Fri, 20 November 2015, 03:44:23
Quote from: katushkin on Tue, 17 November 2015, 17:52:59
If you treat tech support like ****, they will treat you like ****.

Source: Am tech support. If you start straight out like a smart-ass, we aren't going to do anything to help you.

You have to think that there are probably only half a dozen max tech support guys using the live chat stuff, and they probably have four or five people going at any one time, searching for solutions, and doing whatever else.

yyyyyup. nothing i hate more than a know it all with a problem google could have solved.
Title: Re: Inane tech-support chat
Post by: ander on Mon, 28 December 2015, 06:16:30
Ah, I forgot about this thread...

Quote from: katushkin on Tue, 17 November 2015, 17:52:59
If you treat tech support like ****, they will treat you like ****... Source: Am tech support. If you start straight out like a smart-ass, we aren't going to do anything to help you...

That's too bad—you're missing a chance to improve yourself (and who knows, maybe them too).

I've worked help desks, and sure, I had my share of rude, impatient people. However, I really do feel like I gave this fellow several chances and we weren't getting anywhere.

Tech-support people don't know what a customer's experience level is unless the customer volunteers it, so they default to hand-holding. When I asked him not to use macros, I wasn't being arrogant; I just wanted him to know I was technical and he wouldn't have to bother with things like boilerplate courtesy texts. In hindsight, perhaps I should've said, "You don't have to use macros on me." That's what I meant, anyway.


Quote from: suicidal_orange on Tue, 17 November 2015, 18:01:56
I had a couple of day e-mail conversation with BT when my broadband speed dropped to near zero, in the end I resorted to suggesting that "my neighbour's microwave might have exploded causing a genetic mutation in my internal wiring."  Surprisingly the issue was progressed to someone with a better grasp of English and my problem was fixed...

LOL! I'll have to remember that method. I'm great at generating incomprehensible text, as anyone who's read my posts here will know.


Quote from: njbair on Tue, 17 November 2015, 18:07:17
The Apple version:

Apple: Hi, njbair! How was your dinner at Davitino's last night?

Me: What? How did you know I ate at Davitino's?

Apple: What? Oh, nevermind. Lucky guess, I suppose...

Too funny!!