Stopping by without calling

[CX23882]

Something that really annoys me is when people stop by without calling beforehand. Is it really asking too much to call half an hour before you come knocking on my door? It's not that I don't want to see them, but I don't want to see them as I'm about to sit down for my dinner, coming out of the shower or just wanting a quiet night in with the girlfriend. Of course, if you're sitting down for dinner they'll usually decline any offer for food and sit watching you whilst you're eating. And no matter what you do (as the callee), you look like the arsehole. Some people are also immune to signals that you want them to leave. You can't tell them to leave because you look like the arsehole, not them for assuming that you have nothing better to do. I know in some cultures it's acceptable to just stop by but to me it's rude. I don't mind family stopping by, but friends, particularly if they're drunk and talking gibberish, just drives me mad.

Is this an unwritten rule of society or am I just an anti-social computer geek?

Thoughts?

[iMav]

Just don't invite them in when they stop by.

[ch_123]

Woah, did you report him? Sounds like you had a solid case for animal cruelty there.

And I agree with some of the above sentiments, I would politely inform the person that they could not stay, and have done so before.

[D-EJ915]

I think the postman needs more ninja training

[ricercar]

We're hard-pressed to turn away people, because we're SO BAD at keeping in touch. Yet if it's a bad time, we do says so. Fortunately we have a famous drop-by pot-luck almost every Friday, so most of our drop-by company is on Fridays.

[itlnstln]

Just show up to the door sweaty and in your boxers with some Sade playing in the background.  That should send a pretty clear message that it's a bad time.  TBH, if I'm not expecting someone, I flat out don't answer the door.  Same thing with phone calls.  No caller ID, no answer.  If it's that important, they can leave a message, and I'll get back to them if I so choose.

[TheSoulhunter]

TBH, if I'm not expecting someone, I flat out don't answer the door.  Same thing with phone calls.  No caller ID, no answer.  If it's that important, they can leave a message, and I'll get back to them if I so choose.

Same here...

[Rajagra]

That's extreme...

I have a device plugged into the line that auto dials *69 to disable other people's caller ID displaying my info and I don't leave messages (if I'm calling, it's because I need your attention NOW, not in 10 minutes, not in an hour), so it's good I don't have to call you.

I heard a wise saying once: "My phone is for MY benefit, not for yours."


I have heard many people recommend rejecting calls that withhold caller ID. If 90% of your incoming calls were cold-calling salesmen and scam artists like I get, you would understand.

I don't have caller ID or I would do this too. It was explained to me that you can have your phone line set up so that it automatically rejects callers who withhold caller ID, and a message tells them that this has happened, and why. Seems perfect. You want to speak? Identify yourself. (NB withholding caller ID is treated differently to ID not being available.)

[itlnstln]

That's extreme...
 
I have a device plugged into the line that auto dials *69 to disable other people's caller ID displaying my info and I don't leave messages (if I'm calling, it's because I need your attention NOW, not in 10 minutes, not in an hour), so it's good I don't have to call you.

Really, the only people my technique catches is telemarketers.  If I know you, your number shows up on the caller ID.  Now, if you don't show your caller ID, you will be meeting the Sprint mailbox of ItlnStln.  That said, if you were to call me, and I "knew" your number, I would pick up without hesitation.
 
Telemarketers screwed it up for everyone.

[itlnstln]

I have heard many people recommend rejecting calls that withhold caller ID. If 90% of your incoming calls were cold-calling salesmen and scam artists like I get, you would understand.
 
I don't have caller ID or I would do this too. It was explained to me that you can have your phone line set up so that it automatically rejects callers who withhold caller ID, and a message tells them that this has happened, and why. Seems perfect.

I am on a Simulposting roll today.

[Rajagra]

Not a valid youtube URL

[roaduck]

RE: Stopping by without calling




If I'm busy or don't want to be disturbed I just blank the door and the phone unless I'm expecting somebody to call because of prior arrangement over the phone.

Why should we make up excuses why we're busy when people call? We don't need a reason to say why we don't want to be disturbed in our own homes; I'm not rude just assertive and politely tell them it's not convenient to call right now and if they push the issue and ask why I say that it's none of their business - it's as simple as that.

I had a couple of mates that didn't get the hint when it was time to leave and overstayed their welcome but they soon got blown out for good.If people just automatically assume that I have nothing better to do than act as host at the drop of the hat then it's their mistake. I hate ignorant, inconsiderate oafs.

It doesn't take two mins to phone me to ask if it's okay to call round first and my friends and family know that I value my privacy.

I have caller ID and an unlisted and number withheld private telephone number plus I'm on the free telephone preference service list http://www.mpsonline.org.uk/tps/ in the U.K. which is very useful indeed.

When calling some international and North American numbers they can have withheld number block and I just dial a number first to temporarily show my number and everything is clear to the recipient.

[microsoft windows]

Something that really annoys me is when people stop by without calling beforehand. Is it really asking too much to call half an hour before you come knocking on my door? It's not that I don't want to see them, but I don't want to see them as I'm about to sit down for my dinner, coming out of the shower or just wanting a quiet night in with the girlfriend. Of course, if you're sitting down for dinner they'll usually decline any offer for food and sit watching you whilst you're eating. And no matter what you do (as the callee), you look like the arsehole. Some people are also immune to signals that you want them to leave. You can't tell them to leave because you look like the arsehole, not them for assuming that you have nothing better to do. I know in some cultures it's acceptable to just stop by but to me it's rude. I don't mind family stopping by, but friends, particularly if they're drunk and talking gibberish, just drives me mad.

Is this an unwritten rule of society or am I just an anti-social computer geek?

Thoughts?

You need a hyper-active burglar alarm. Loud sirens will scare away just about any visitor. If that doesn't work, just get out the 6-pound-Model M and they're done for.

[mmgoose]

if the visitor's a chick. meh, what's the harm really? unless she's really ugly or you're gay then i'd go and play some 80s porn music the more obnoxious, the better *wakka wakka wakka*(works like a charm). if it's a guy, hide the cheetos and the beer and play something gay like culture club's "do you really want to hurt me?"

that said, i support gay rights and have gay friends. and i haven't turned yet so, it's definitely not something you can catch.

[bigpook]

Maybe I am lucky, but the only uninvited guests are the nutjobs passing out religious material. They are usually well behaved , one look at me and they know they aren't getting into the house.  I use the literature they leave to line the bird cage.
Caller ID is very useful. I don't pick up the phone generally, but if I see the caller ID on the incoming call and recognize it I will pick it up, maybe.
I like voice mail. Thats what it is there for.