I'll donate $50 to GH in your name, plus send you a set of monkey see, hear, speak or whatever they're called... how about that?!
Edit: Or something else... I gave away most of my valuable things to secret santas here at on DT, and
this. Slim pickens around here, but perhaps a translucent black MX keycap set? Gasmasks? Just don't really know what else I have that is tradable. (Keeping my Octoberfest!)
OR, to keep it simple, just let me give you $50 and buy yourself something nice or donate to cure cancer or something. This is 'Merica, dammmmit.