CPTBadAss' One Year Anniversary/XMas Giveaway Contest!! - Winners Announced!!

[foxer]

OH ****. I scrolled down like a few lines and thought it was some sort of cheesy rhyme thing.

[CommunistWitchDr]

wow you still tryin to be an mc?
bein stubborn, stuck there like an SMD
tell you what, you can S my D
'stead of moping in clack therapy
gettin tears all over your keys
'fore putting boards in rice baggies

guys, please don't upset CWD cuz he's
just another GH noob rookie
can't even sell his pure LE
cuz 60% alu cases made too frequently
tryin so hard that **** is a comically
oversaturated market obviously

(I should also note that i sold my pure a super long time ago, I'm just too lazy to update my signature.)

i dont even understand logically
how i type so damn wickedly
this **** is just undeniably
raw talent setting itself free
making me shine like a CREE LED

unlike you i dont gotta keep rhyming "me"
you're just setting yourself up honestly
to keep getting burned so severely, easily
but still trying to spit so stubbornly
while i flow so easily, and effort free
I dont even gotta switch rhyme ends, you see?

fight me you aint gonna make it to round 3
this is like a mortal combat fatality

FLAWLESS
VICTORY

Yeah I still rappin
Can't stop my
Droppin rhymes
Six hundred fifty kelvin
Meltin solder with these lines
Can't take the heat
And off your PCB ya slide

You're jus
Counterfeit
Makin fakes to make a profit
But better forfeit
Cus yer unfit
Detail on your caps
Not even close to accurate
You little *****
Find your body in the river
And my rhyme's the culprit

Ain't sold my pure?
Don't be so sure
That ****'s been sold, I can ensure
Soviet entrepreneur
Your rhymes manure
Rap so impure
Yo always blastin premature
Ain't no wonder I so famous
While you totally obscure
Check the brochure
And take my tour
See sights that make you insecure
I goin pilot fishing
Catch my hook and bite my lure

[YoungMichael88]

It's nice to see this up and running again. So here we go.

No ones been posting, I began to ponder
Perhaps they're out soul searching? Do they aimlessly wander?
Or does absence really make the heart grow fonder?
But hey, that's enough of these senseless questions.
Here's a suggestion. stay outa this contest and avoid the depression. Have you not learned your lesson?

I know I'm electric and you know it too
So visit the thread about what's bothering you
Post "I wish I could spit as well as he do"
But don't hold your breath or you'll turn translucent blue.
I think you bit off more than you can chew.
So just take a minute, let out your "boo hoos" maybe change hobbies from keycaps to shoes. I don't give a **** what you choose. Just stay outa here cuz you gonna lose.

Now before you chirp back and before you go boast
Start at page one and read every post
Do you notice who gets comments the most?
I've even got some from our generous host.
So raise up your glasses I'm giving a toast.
Here's to the fallen, you weren't even close.

[HoffmanMyster]

It's nice to see this up and running again. So here we go.

No ones been posting, I began to ponder
Perhaps they're out soul searching? Do they aimlessly wander?
Or does absence really make the heart grow fonder?
But hey, that's enough of these senseless questions.
Here's a suggestion. stay outa this contest and avoid the depression. Have you not learned your lesson?

I know I'm electric and you know it too
So visit the thread about what's bothering you
Post "I wish I could spit as well as he do"
But don't hold your breath or you'll turn translucent blue.
I think you bit off more than you can chew.
So just take a minute, let out your "boo hoos" maybe change hobbies from keycaps to shoes. I don't give a **** what you choose. Just stay outa here cuz you gonna lose.

Now before you chirp back and before you go boast
Start at page one and read every post
Do you notice who gets comments the most?
I've even got some from our generous host.
So raise up your glasses I'm giving a toast.
Here's to the fallen, you weren't even close.

What? Dude. See: haikus.
We posted a bunch of them.
Did you even read?

[dragonxx21]

It's nice to see this up and running again. So here we go.

No ones been posting, I began to ponder
Perhaps they're out soul searching? Do they aimlessly wander?
Or does absence really make the heart grow fonder?
But hey, that's enough of these senseless questions.
Here's a suggestion. stay outa this contest and avoid the depression. Have you not learned your lesson?

I know I'm electric and you know it too
So visit the thread about what's bothering you
Post "I wish I could spit as well as he do"
But don't hold your breath or you'll turn translucent blue.
I think you bit off more than you can chew.
So just take a minute, let out your "boo hoos" maybe change hobbies from keycaps to shoes. I don't give a **** what you choose. Just stay outa here cuz you gonna lose.

Now before you chirp back and before you go boast
Start at page one and read every post
Do you notice who gets comments the most?
I've even got some from our generous host.
So raise up your glasses I'm giving a toast.
Here's to the fallen, you weren't even close.

You lose, you lose, lose
You lose lose lose lose lose lose
lose lose. Man you lose.

[YoungMichael88]

It's nice to see this up and running again. So here we go.

No ones been posting, I began to ponder
Perhaps they're out soul searching? Do they aimlessly wander?
Or does absence really make the heart grow fonder?
But hey, that's enough of these senseless questions.
Here's a suggestion. stay outa this contest and avoid the depression. Have you not learned your lesson?

I know I'm electric and you know it too
So visit the thread about what's bothering you
Post "I wish I could spit as well as he do"
But don't hold your breath or you'll turn translucent blue.
I think you bit off more than you can chew.
So just take a minute, let out your "boo hoos" maybe change hobbies from keycaps to shoes. I don't give a **** what you choose. Just stay outa here cuz you gonna lose.

Now before you chirp back and before you go boast
Start at page one and read every post
Do you notice who gets comments the most?
I've even got some from our generous host.
So raise up your glasses I'm giving a toast.
Here's to the fallen, you weren't even close.

What? Dude. See: haikus.
We posted a bunch of them.
Did you even read?

Stick to the rap game
We all know haikus won't win
They are so not cool

[YoungMichael88]

It's nice to see this up and running again. So here we go.

No ones been posting, I began to ponder
Perhaps they're out soul searching? Do they aimlessly wander?
Or does absence really make the heart grow fonder?
But hey, that's enough of these senseless questions.
Here's a suggestion. stay outa this contest and avoid the depression. Have you not learned your lesson?

I know I'm electric and you know it too
So visit the thread about what's bothering you
Post "I wish I could spit as well as he do"
But don't hold your breath or you'll turn translucent blue.
I think you bit off more than you can chew.
So just take a minute, let out your "boo hoos" maybe change hobbies from keycaps to shoes. I don't give a **** what you choose. Just stay outa here cuz you gonna lose.

Now before you chirp back and before you go boast
Start at page one and read every post
Do you notice who gets comments the most?
I've even got some from our generous host.
So raise up your glasses I'm giving a toast.
Here's to the fallen, you weren't even close.

You lose, you lose, lose
You lose lose lose lose lose lose
lose lose. Man you lose.

I already won
Like hammer, you can't touch this
The rest is gravy

[noisyturtle]

**** in a tube sock
Harden it in the freezer
Then go **** yourself

~Margret Thatcher

[CommunistWitchDr]

What? Dude. See: haikus.
We posted a bunch of them.
Did you even read?

Rap based poetry
Spit Haikus, yeah ***** that's me
Five seven five, see

I be mad frightnin
Lines shock your skull like lightnin
My rhymes enlightnin

And I da Titan
Grab the wrench and I tighten
Squeeze your coal: diamond

No reply: silence
Stand up to the rap tyrant
Get thrown to lions

Spread like a virus
To kill, I got a license
Sharpen my trident

Like Greek king Midas
Everything I touch turns gold
My rap is so bold

And *****, you got told
Leave your body in the cold
Yeah, you got controlled

Twofold, rap poems
I unroll, till you go home
Goodnight and shalom

[CPTBadAss]

LOL I approve of this new development: Haiku disses...also rap haikus.

[HoffmanMyster]

What? Dude. See: haikus.
We posted a bunch of them.
Did you even read?

Rap based poetry
Spit Haikus, yeah ***** that's me
Five seven five, see

I be mad frightnin
Lines shock your skull like lightnin
My rhymes enlightnin

And I da Titan
Grab the wrench and I tighten
Squeeze your coal: diamond

No reply: silence
Stand up to the rap tyrant
Get thrown to lions

Spread like a virus
To kill, I got a license
Sharpen my trident

Like Greek king Midas
Everything I touch turns gold
My rap is so bold

And *****, you got told
Leave your body in the cold
Yeah, you got controlled

Twofold, rap poems
I unroll, till you go home
Goodnight and shalom

Damn, son, you talk smack.
Got anything to back that?
Or just this whack rap?

Don't even start me,
You can't handle my haikus.
I got this ****, true.

Oh, whoops, too late now.
No turning back from this crap.
Just look what you did.

.....
.......
.....

Actually, no.
This ends now. No survivors.
I will end you here.

* HoffmanMyster strikes.

* CommunistWitchDr dies.
The crowd rejoices.

To conclude, I ask:
Are you that daft? We all know
how to ****'n haiku.

PS: Sorry bout that.
Didn't mean to kill you there.
**** happens I guess.

[tuxsavvy]

Looks like I barely qualify for contest but because I can't rap so I'll stay out.

Good luck to all contestants nonetheless!

[YoungMichael88]

What? Dude. See: haikus.
We posted a bunch of them.
Did you even read?

Rap based poetry
Spit Haikus, yeah ***** that's me
Five seven five, see

I be mad frightnin
Lines shock your skull like lightnin
My rhymes enlightnin

And I da Titan
Grab the wrench and I tighten
Squeeze your coal: diamond

No reply: silence
Stand up to the rap tyrant
Get thrown to lions

Spread like a virus
To kill, I got a license
Sharpen my trident

Like Greek king Midas
Everything I touch turns gold
My rap is so bold

And *****, you got told
Leave your body in the cold
Yeah, you got controlled

Twofold, rap poems
I unroll, till you go home
Goodnight and shalom

Damn, son, you talk smack.
Got anything to back that?
Or just this whack rap?

Don't even start me,
You can't handle my haikus.
I got this ****, true.

Oh, whoops, too late now.
No turning back from this crap.
Just look what you did.

.....
.......
.....

Actually, no.
This ends now. No survivors.
I will end you here.

* HoffmanMyster strikes.

* CommunistWitchDr dies.
The crowd rejoices.

To conclude, I ask:
Are you that daft? We all know
how to ****'n haiku.

PS: Sorry bout that.
Didn't mean to kill you there.
**** happens I guess.

"how to ****'n haiku." = 6
"PS: Sorry bout that." = 6

Gonna lose points there
I'm sure Captain will not care
You should learn to count

[YoungMichael88]

LOL I approve of this new development: Haiku disses...also rap haikus.

Ok then let's go
Rap haiku you want? Let's roll
**harness Sifos soul**

Ring the bell, round one
Swingin lefts and rights for fun
You got Nuthin, son

Haiku rap is bold
Leave you outside in the cold
Plain rap getting old

Do as you are told
Cry again in the shower
You are a coward

I have the power
That taste in your mouth? sour
I will devour

Faker than some clacks
Your haikus are out of wack
Stab you in the back

Here's a sneak attack
Check for nuts inside your sack
Nothing but a crack

Your rhymes are too stale
More boring than reading brail
My rhymes are for sale

You should buy a few
Post a classified for you
Others should buy too

[HoffmanMyster]

"how to ****'n haiku." = 6
"PS: Sorry bout that." = 6

Gonna lose points there
I'm sure Captain will not care
You should learn to count

Damn, you caught me there.
Don't worry, he will allow.
Captain got my back.

[YoungMichael88]

"how to ****'n haiku." = 6
"PS: Sorry bout that." = 6

Gonna lose points there
I'm sure Captain will not care
You should learn to count

Damn, you caught me there.
Don't worry, he will allow.
Captain got my back.

You live and you learn
Tho it is embarrassing
You will be just fine

[HoffmanMyster]

"how to ****'n haiku." = 6
"PS: Sorry bout that." = 6

Gonna lose points there
I'm sure Captain will not care
You should learn to count

Damn, you caught me there.
Don't worry, he will allow.
Captain got my back.

You live and you learn
Tho it is embarrassing
You will be just fine

Just for the record,
****'n is one syllable, man.
Apostrophes, yo.

[YoungMichael88]

"how to ****'n haiku." = 6
"PS: Sorry bout that." = 6

Gonna lose points there
I'm sure Captain will not care
You should learn to count

Damn, you caught me there.
Don't worry, he will allow.
Captain got my back.

You live and you learn
Tho it is embarrassing
You will be just fine

Just for the record,
****'n is one syllable, man.
Apostrophes, yo.

Pronunciation
No way that's one syllable
learn to English man

EDIT: "****'n is one syllable, man." = 8

[Linkbane]

Something I haven't mentioned yet is that I've written sonnets for a while. So hopefully I'll impress you a little, if for nothing other than the pleasure of other Geekhackers. If you do deem me worthy, though, I'd love a shot at the Mint Green clack.

Song of the Keys

By every touch, man bonds with machine-
While others look elsewhere to spend riches,
From our work and pleasure our passion we glean;
But still we vary, mostly in switches.

From linear, angels' gentle lyre,
And tactile, tireless pianoforte,
To click, violin of burning fire,
Even Topre's beautiful harpsichord.

Our family is one of naught but thought;
For time given to worship one's fingers,
Crafted from perfection, like double-shot,
Bring us together, to love and linger.

As years pass by, may we take some moments,
To appreciate what geekhack has lent.   

[demik]

boobs
tits
funbags
weeeeeee

i win gimme all that ****.

[YoungMichael88]

boobs
tits
funbags
weeeeeee

i win gimme all that ****.

Boobs, tits, funbags weeeeeee
I win gimme all that ****
Finished your haiku


You're welcome.

[HoffmanMyster]

Damn, I done forget.
There are clacks at stake here, guys.
Good thing I won, huh?

[CPTBadAss]

boobs
tits
funbags
weeeeeee

i win gimme all that ****.

I don't know who this "damilk" guy is. Too new to qualify in my opinion .

[rowdy]

boobs
tits
funbags
weeeeeee

i win gimme all that ****.

I don't know who this "damilk" guy is. Too new to qualify in my opinion .

Sounds like he should be posting here instead.

[CPTBadAss]

I will be doing a dramatic reading of my favorite entries as well as the rap battle from the old topic.


Watch this space.

Dorkvader I'm waiting bro

[Stevenator21]

You think you know as much as me?
Nope, I guess you are a ******* tree
Knowing more about boards than CPT
Rapping harder than buckling springs
I guess you can call me the master of keys
Like Spam, Bunny, and obviously me
Try to come against me, nope you'll never succeed because you're inferior and you use PBT
I've got all the switches and all the keys.
Did I mention my vast collection of novelty caps?
I have Clacks and bots worth more than your life and led backlighting sexier then your wife.

Wait, take that back you don't got no wife

[AKIMbO]

Got the disease like china got bird flu
Raping my wallet like the FSU QB do

Forever maxed my CCs with CCs
So much debt I've gotta burn some trees for release

It ain't that bad though
It's not like I gotta take a second mortgage out on my condo

This is my story about what GH do
Reel you in, turn you on, then leave your balls blue

There's never any release
I'm screaming *****es please

No, I don't need that 660C
No, I don't need that new buckling spring

Oh ****, it's a dibs sale
Brb, gonna pull that new CC offer out of the mail

[Stevenator21]

By accident I quoted my rap while editing it, this is not supposed to be here!

[CPTBadAss]

Just a reminder guys, this ends this coming Sunday 12/15/13. If you want a shot at a free Clack, QFR, or some Legos now is the time to make some rhymes or a haiku!!

[YoungMichael88]

This coming Sunday
The end seems so far away
I want a prize now!

[noisyturtle]

Burning cherry tree
Every blossom is a flame
Oh, here come the cops

[rowdy]

CPTBadAss' One
Year Anniversary/X-
Mas Giveaway con-

>.<

test

[dragonxx21]

This is my entry
Clack and keyboard are all fine
C-P-T: They're mine

^

my entry

[CPTBadAss]

4 more days!

[HoffmanMyster]

4 more days!

Wow, you can't haiku?
You ask so much of us, though.
I feel cheated, man.

[CPTBadAss]

Wow, you can't haiku?
You ask so much of us, though.
I feel cheated, man.

Come at me brother
You call that **** a haiku?
Feel cheated defeated, man

[HoffmanMyster]

Wow, you can't haiku?
You ask so much of us, though.
I feel cheated, man.

Come at me brother
You call that **** a haiku?
Feel cheated defeated, man

Bro, that's a haiku.
Just the same as this one here.
Glad to see you join.

[rowdy]

I cannot Haiku
They sound lame and don't end right
Should I give up now?

[jdcarpe]

I must be honest
This has gone on for so long
I lost interest

[Puddsy]

gib me free keyboards
I wish I could rhyme or count
syllables

[rowdy]

Ode to a free Clack
It was all dark and stormy
This ended too soon

[YoungMichael88]

The final countdown
Here's to a wonderful year
With Captain BadAss

[rowdy]

Clack Clack Clack Clack Clack
Clack Clack Clack Clack Clack Clack Clack
Clack Clack Clack Clack Clack

[Wildcard]

My birthday is on
Clacks are always the best gifts
December 16th

[rowdy]

I wish I could rhyme
I might be in with a chance
Unlucky today

[Belfong]

Geekhack wallethacked me
I am broke, can you pity me
I must be honest, Clack's for me!

[rowdy]

At night darkness comes
A backlit keyboard is good
Stare at pretty lights

[VesperSAINT]

My luck sux these days
Christmas around the corner
A glimmer of hope

[naokira]

Must win a click-clack
or I'll murder somebody
redrum redrum clack

[CPTBadAss]

I must be honest
This has gone on for so long
I lost interest

I knew I should've sent you coal instead

gib me free keyboards
I wish I could rhyme or count
syllables

Last line is only 3!!

My birthday is on
Clacks are always the best gifts
December 16th

Cheater


Hehe, I actually think I might end this a couple days earlier. Get your entries in before 2359 EST or 11:59 PM EST 12/13/13, tonight. I'll pick winners sometime over this weekend.