Depression. I wish I could either stop going to work or do something I give even the slightest crap about. I am wasting my life sitting at a desk doing nothing. I can't focus on the little work that I do have because it's so dull and because I constantly think about the time I'm wasting in that moment and how I can get out of it instead of the work at hand.
Committing to a big change and getting out your comfort zone can work wonders for that.
I've been in that same kind of position you describe feeling constantly unfulfilled, bored, and low energy. Every single day was the same exact thing. After more than 3 years I had to get out of it and wound up taking a different job for a bit less money. The job wasn't necessarily more interesting, but it was different enough from anything else I'd been doing previously that it was at least satisfying on the level that I was fulfilling my purpose as a human by learning and honing new skills. So I felt like I was growing not in the job, but as a person.
Not too long after that I got a job that was both super challenging AND interesting, and instead of coming in there dead brained and jaded I was refreshed by this stop-gap work and nailed the next opportunity. Granted taking new risks and stepping out of your comfort zone when things are stable is really ****ing hard, but if you do nothing, nothing will happen.
Sometimes just doing something completely different from your norm can change your perspective enough to give you the fortitude keep going.
Thanks for the advice. I know you are right, and I have been thinking along these lines myself. It currently is really hard to move on because things are "comfortable" (weird to say because I want to die sometimes even though things aren't stressful or difficult). This job is easy and pays well (although I could make more), and the company has hemorrhaged so much staff in the past few years that I'd really have to screw up to lose my job here. On top of that, management and co-workers are very understanding and laid back. So it's secure, pays enough, laid back, and easy - just enough good things that it's scary to leave. But I feel useless and meaningless.
I was in customer support here for several years, and it was genuinely awful. Then I moved to software testing, and all the stress evaporated and I instantly felt that I was having a great impact because I came into the new role with years of experience and knew things my teammates didn't and there was a lot of work to do. Then about a year or year and a half ago, things slowed down and the nature of the workflow is such that I either can't help with certain things or other people who are also looking for things to do just gobble up the available work before I can get to it. At this point, I feel so disengaged that I can barely pay enough attention to keep up; I think this is because the mental energy to keep up with everything is far greater than the value I would add back by knowing what's going on.
Depression. I wish I could either stop going to work or do something I give even the slightest crap about. I am wasting my life sitting at a desk doing nothing. I can't focus on the little work that I do have because it's so dull and because I constantly think about the time I'm wasting in that moment and how I can get out of it instead of the work at hand.
I find there are two ways to look at pointless work - either it's holding you back or it's keeping you afloat financially while requiring minimal effort leaving most of your energy for non-work.
I agree with noisy though, if it's possible take a pay cut and go do something interesting. I escaped an office job then spent a couple of months plumbing with my cousin and now work in a CNC place having gone in with no relevant experience or qualifications just some faked (can't know it will be good 'til you've done it) enthusiasm.
When I moved to my current role, I had a fantasy that I would suddenly have a lot more free time because work and stress wouldn't follow me home, but, of course, the day still has the same number of hours. I guess I technically have more free time at work, but it's hard to fill that time with anything productive for various reasons (mainly appearances).
It sounds like fun to work on something physical like plumbing or CNC. At least, you can actually see the work you've done and you get to move around a bit. My current fantasy is to teach English in Denmark (I'm not sure why Denmark, but I got it in my head somehow when watching
Forbrydelsen) or possibly Germany, or maybe even teaching English Composition at a local college, but I have no qualifications, it would probably pay beans, and the former would require uprooting my whole life.