Author Topic: What the Elle is Wrong With People? (Read 3359 times)

Findecanor · « **on:** Sun, 12 July 2015, 16:30:52 »

Today, I found in an electronics dumpster (for electronics only) what I think is the ugliest, grimiest, most disgusting keyboard I have ever seen in real life.
Before this, I have got vintage keyboards with sand in them, keyboards that have been sitting in workshops for twenty years and been covered with soot and dust inside and out, but nothing... nothing was as disgusting as this one.
The case was sticky. Every key had some slimy residue on it. There were lots of grime, food and pubic hair under the keys. Even the plate for the Cherry MX switches had a fatty residue on it as if it had been sprayed with cooking oil. The rags I used to clean the cable with got brown streaks on it.

Vintage keyboard? A keyboard from a kitchen or industrial setting?
Hell no. It was a ... ... a gaming keyboard... A Razer Blackwidow Ultimate 2013 ... 2013! Not even old!

Some users have no respect...

Anyway. I got the innards out and cleaned the plate and switches. It works, except for one key that register but does not click.

SpAmRaY · « **Reply #1 on:** Sun, 12 July 2015, 16:38:19 »

Hope you washed any biological material off.

Ludovician · « **Reply #2 on:** Sun, 12 July 2015, 16:50:01 »

Well, at least they didn't do such things to a korean custom or something like that.

Leslieann · « **Reply #3 on:** Sun, 12 July 2015, 16:51:06 »

I'm glad he hasn't seen the state of the BWU in my basement.

)

fohat.digs · « **Reply #4 on:** Sun, 12 July 2015, 16:56:23 »

That is why I love Model Fs.

You can take them apart completely and 95% (actually probably 99%+) of the pieces could take a good hot soapy bath.

ander · « **Reply #5 on:** Sun, 12 July 2015, 18:06:26 »

Quote from: Findecanor on Sun, 12 July 2015, 16:30:52

The case was sticky. Every key had some slimy residue on it. There were lots of grime, food and pubic hair under the keys. Even the plate for the Cherry MX switches had a fatty residue on it as if it had been sprayed with cooking oil...

Pubic hair? Slimy residue? It sounds like this previous owner may have, um, unnatural relationships with their KBs. :?P

When you consider what so many people use the Internet for, it's surprising more KBs don't end up that way. LOL

Anyway, you're a braver restorer than I am. I'm not a germ freak by any means, but I think I would've taken one look at all that and turfed it. I wouldn't even wish it on the nice old ladies at the thrift store.

All this reminds me of some Reddit conversations I've seen by germ-phobic people who also happen to be crazy about vintage KBs. They won't touch anything that's used without wearing biohazard gloves (maybe even respirators—it wouldn't surprise me) and go to extraordinary lengths to sterilize them before they'd even consider using them. At first I thought it was a put-on, but no, they were serious. Can you imagine having two such conflicting interests? Yikes.

chyros · « **Reply #6 on:** Sun, 12 July 2015, 18:48:48 »

Yugh Oo .

My '87 Model M, when I got it, had so much fluff, hair, dust and dead insects in it I could literally not see any part of the barrel plate anymore (it had piled to at least half a centimetre). I had belonged to a research group that evidently never cleaned it. Some other, which I'll review later, were also quite horrible, in a different way (you'll hear about them later

.

Never seen PUBIC HAIR in one though! xD

Snowdog993 · « **Reply #7 on:** Sun, 12 July 2015, 19:57:24 »

Well, I suppose the honeymoon is apparently over.

Computer-Lab in Basement · « **Reply #8 on:** Sun, 12 July 2015, 19:59:45 »

aaaaand now you probably have an STD

ander · « **Reply #9 on:** Sun, 12 July 2015, 20:05:26 »

Well, it is possible that the previous owner just had short curly head hair...

I think we should start a "Keyboards of Horror" topic where people can post photos and stories of the grossest KBs they've restored (or—buh ha ha!!—decided not to restore). The first post can include this special soundfile I've created so people can play it to provide the right atmosphere.

fohat.digs · « **Reply #10 on:** Sun, 12 July 2015, 20:18:41 »

Last year somebody was complaining in a thread like this and had never heard the term "board chow"

Snowdog993 · « **Reply #11 on:** Sun, 12 July 2015, 22:12:07 »

Quote from: fohat.digs on Sun, 12 July 2015, 20:18:41

Last year somebody was complaining in a thread like this and had never heard the term "board chow"

I would say there are people who are keyboard enthusiasts, and some that have several hobbies under their belt Fohat. I would think that a lot of people don't even know what the heck "keyboard chow" actually is. If you ask someone who knows about computers, I would think more than half of them wouldn't know what that term actually means at all.
Some other term will be coined and we will sit there and say "Huh? What does that mean?". Oh! You mean 'this expression' A new term for something is always going to be coined and whatever takes will take.
I think I will have a "soda" er "coke" er "pop" now.

Edit: A glass of milk.

tbc · « **Reply #12 on:** Sun, 12 July 2015, 23:04:20 »

Quote from: Computer-Lab in Basement on Sun, 12 July 2015, 19:59:45

aaaaand now you probably have an STD

so THIS is why all the gb organizers end up in the hospital.

mystery solved folks. dilute your sodium levels.

xD

fohat.digs · « **Reply #13 on:** Mon, 13 July 2015, 07:42:57 »

Quote from: Snowdog993 on Sun, 12 July 2015, 22:12:07

I think I will have a "soda" er "coke" er "pop" now.

Yep, growing up in the South in the 1950s-60s, any carbonated soft drink is a "coke"

tp4tissue · « **Reply #14 on:** Mon, 13 July 2015, 11:39:19 »

This is how you get hand-aids.

demik · « **Reply #15 on:** Mon, 13 July 2015, 11:41:32 »

So you went to a dumpster and found trash... What are the odds of that?

ander · « **Reply #16 on:** Fri, 17 July 2015, 22:00:42 »

Quote from: Snowdog993 on Sun, 12 July 2015, 22:12:07

I would think that a lot of people don't even know what the heck "keyboard chow" actually is...

In the interest of education, whenever anyone wonders what it is, one of us should mail them a sample. Let's start setting some aside for that purpose.

Quote from: tp4tissue on Mon, 13 July 2015, 11:39:19

This is how you get hand-aids.

LOL

Coreda · « **Reply #17 on:** Fri, 17 July 2015, 22:06:28 »

Burn it just to be safe.

ander · « **Reply #18 on:** Fri, 17 July 2015, 22:11:57 »

We usually just ship it off it to China, where the laws against spreading plagues aren't as strictly enforced.

Screwdriver · « **Reply #19 on:** Sun, 19 July 2015, 08:42:07 »

I did IT for a very large insurance company and we had this guy who was obsessed with hand lotion. Greasy hand lotion. His keyboard and mouse were so freaking disgusting and would develop a layer that looked and felt like a sticky football. It would build up so bad that it would form a bridge between keys that he needed something to break the bond so both keys would not register when using one. It also built up to the point that you could not see the letters.

v0idtek · « **Reply #20 on:** Mon, 20 July 2015, 12:44:14 »

I'm pretty lax with my keyboards, but once sticky or grimey stuff gets on there it's cleaning time. Just feels like ass to type on that.
Maybe the people using it were doing a bunch of mechanical stuff or worked on cars or something similar and just didn't have time to clean their hands?
Not sure why you'd use a gaming KB in the scenario though.

ander · « **Reply #21 on:** Mon, 20 July 2015, 21:59:43 »

heedpantsnow · « **Reply #22 on:** Mon, 20 July 2015, 23:16:44 »

Yuck bro.

ander · « **Reply #23 on:** Tue, 21 July 2015, 00:00:00 »

It's just merchandising.

Quote from: Snowdog993 on Sun, 12 July 2015, 19:57:24

Well, I suppose the honeymoon is apparently over.

You didn't have board chow on your honeymoon? I can't be the only one here who did... This honeymoon's still going—yeah, baby!

News:

Author Topic: What the Elle is Wrong With People? (Read 3359 times)